Shake It Out
by Ninazadzia
Summary: "Just trust me, okay? I don't get why that's so hard-" "Because you haven't told me the truth!" "You want to know the truth? Alright, fine. I never stopped loving you." Because the past always has a way of resurfacing, especially for Cato, Clove, Glimmer and Marvel. Sweet Nothing sequel, inspired by Florence and the Machine. T for sex.
1. Chapter One: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

It wasn't until my senior year that I started going to our team dinners. Y'know, the things our cross country team would throw the night before meets to carbo-load and 'bond.' I never believed in them before—carbo-loading for 5Ks? Please. It's twenty minutes of your life, I _don't _think you'll burn through two thousand calories worth of pasta.

Most of the girls knew that, and my teammates weren't fatasses, either. Those girls went to those dinners for one purpose. To talk about who's dating who, what boy they had their eyes on, which colleges they were applying too, you get the picture. When you spend twenty hours a week with a group of people, you tend to become their friends, _especially _when there's a common denominator. I was the girl that went out of her way to _not _make any friends. But even with my self-imposed isolation, I could tell they were all best friends on and off the track.

I was a little late to join the cross-country family, rah-rah, go-team spirit fiesta. But by the middle of my Junior year, I did.

"Clover, can you pass the remote?"

Johanna Mason was asking. She was a jack of all trades, and in track she could do anything from the 2 mile to the 200. She insisted on calling me Clover. She was also the reason Katniss Everdeen and I developed the weird, completely impractical friendship we did at the end of last year.

I passed it to her. We all curled up around the Emersons' TV (it was Finch's week to host the dinner), our conversations switching back and forth from boys to cross-country, school to cross-country, makeup to Mount Saint Mary's (our rival cross-country team), and gossip to cross-country. The entire time, Vampire Diaries was playing in background. On occasion Finch—a die-hard fan of the show—would shush us all. "Shut up, I'm trying to watch Delena!"

By the end of the episode, it was close to nine PM, and we were all lapsing into food comas. The room was quiet as we watched its end.

I've never watched Vampire Diaries before in my life, but from what I gathered, a brother was fighting his sister. The brother had a knife in his hand, calling his blonde sister a fool. He had a knife in his hand; she was crying.

_Jesus. How melodramatic._

"Go right ahead. Laugh at the girl who loved too easily." All of our eyes were fixated on the screen. "But I would rather live my life than yours, Nick."

Tears were streaming down her face. _Pfft. Cliché._

"No one will _ever _sit around and a table and tell stories about a man who couldn't love."

I froze.

_It's a TV show, Clove. _

I watched as the brother drove the knife through her heart. Finch was on the verge of tears, emotionally moved by the entire thing. The episode came to a close shortly after that, and that was when the talking picked back up, everyone making some sort of comment on the romantic dynamics or the family feud. And all the while, I clamped my mouth shut, frozen at the foot of Finch Emerson's couch.

I didn't have any sympathy for the brother. The sister's voice rang in my head.

_No one will ever sit around a table and tell stories about a man who couldn't love._

The memories came flooding back before I could stop them.

_Cato Ludwig._

And like that, my heart started pounding out of my chest.

I was the brother.

XXX

**A/N: . . . and she's baaaaaaaaaack!**

**This fic is set a little less than a year after the end of **_**Sweet Nothing. **_**Read it if you haven't, because then everything will make a million times more sense.**

**Gahhhh. I'm excited. I haven't been this excited about a multi-chap in a long time.**

**The Vampire Diaries line references a Klaus/Rebekah scene from earlier this season. What can I say? I got inspired.**

**xx Nina**

**PS. I like you for reading. I'll love you for reviewing.**


	2. Chapter Two: Glimmer

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Glimmer~

Room 127 was being mobbed. Passing the brainiacs, I rolled my eyes, flipping my blonde hair over my shoulder. Figures. Madison's oh-so-perfect students' one days of disorderly conduct was the result of school.

It was November 30th, otherwise known as Washington day for our senior class. Our debate team was ranked second in the country, and every year, debate/history/government nerds ripped each others' heads off fighting for a spot on our school's most coveted internship. I couldn't tell you what the internship was for the life of me, except that it had something to do with being a snotty Senator's coffee bitch or whatever. For some reason the senior go-po kids worked themselves up about it every year.

Alina and Kat-the smartest girls in my grade-backed out of my mob, running to the bathroom and crying. _Hahhh. Someone got rejected_.

There were six-hundred people in my grade, and only four spots for the internship. Washington Day might as well be called heartbreak day, because it was the day the intern list was posted.

Honestly, I don't give a flying fuck about November 30th ninety-nine percent of the time. I walked on by, not turning back for a second look as I heard more exclamations of anger or confusion.

"Marvel!"

"Have you seen it yet?"

I stopped walking, hearing that name. I'm pretty sure it was Peeta Mellark that was calling for him.

I took a glance over my shoulder. I couldn't see the acceptance list, but everyone seemed to clear a pathway as Marvel Quaid walked up to it.

There were easily forty people mobbed around the sheet of paper-he didn't even know I was standing maybe five yards away, staring at him. I watched as a smile broke out on his face, and as he put his finger to the words printed on the acceptance list. He turned back to face Peeta, grinning.

"We're going to Washington!"

It was all hoots and hollers from there. Even the most competitive rejects gave Marvel a clap on the back, congratulating him.

I didn't. I turned around, walking to class as fast I could in my four inch wedges. I kept my head down and tried to block the name "Marvel Quaid" from my mind.

I knew this much about the Washington Internship-it went from January to June. The next time I'd see Marvel would be graduation.

XXX

**A/N: Oi. Marvel, you nerd.**

**Thanks so much for reviewing. Chapter one's kind reception made my day.**

**I'll be updating either every day or every other day with this fic, as I did with Sweet Nothing.**

**Tease for tomorrow: Alcomahol!**

**xx Nina**


	3. Chapter Three: Marvel

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Marvel~

There was a knock on my door on November 30th. When I answered it, Clove was in the doorframe, a bottle of champagne in her hand that she was already drinking from.

"I brought the nice stuff," she singsonged.

I laughed, grabbing the bottle from her and taking a gulp without hesitation. She threw her arms around me, and I walked her inside.

"You've had a hella good day," she called to me. I was in the other room, grabbing two glasses.

"I'm free, Clove! I get to skip out on the last six months of high school."

"Yeah, and be some pretentious Governor's lap-dog," she teased. I handed her a glass.

"Senator," I corrected. "And Washington is to me as Footlocker is to you, so shut up."

"Well. I guess we have two things to drink to, then." She was referencing last week's Footlocker region race, and since she'd placed seventh in the Northeast, she was going to San Diego and competing against the most elite high school runners in the nation.

So we drank ourselves silly that night. We toasted to Footlocker, to Washington, to Stanford and Yale, which I still hadn't heard back from but was pretty sure it was a done deal. We blasted some Black Keys and played one-on-one beer pong. It was a party of two, but I was celebrating with Clove, which made all the difference.

At one point in the night, when we were well beyond buzzed, I gave her a sloppy peck on the lips. I lingered without really meaning to, and after I pulled away, we both laughed.

"Oh, fucking god—"

"It's like kissing my sister," I drawled. She wiped her mouth.

I'd been dreaming about Washington since Freshman year—now, I was celebrating it with my best friend and fancy champagne.

It's safe to say Glimmer Rambin and Cato Ludwig weren't on my mind.

XXX

**A/N: I don't know about you, but I'm digging the Clove/Marvel bromance.**

**Thank you all for your incredibly kind feedback. Remember, children: 1 review = 1 Christmas cookie. I swear. Karma works in wondrous ways.**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for tomorrow? More Clove!**


	4. Chapter Four: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

At the end of the day, I'm stupid. Actually, I'm stupid as hell. It doesn't matter what my GPA or SAT score is, because really, no one gives a flying fuck about them six months after high school ends.

_No one will ever sit around a table and tell stories about a man who couldn't love._

It was a line from Vampire Diaries, and a stupid line at that. That's what I kept telling myself as took my Calc test the next day, unable to shake those words from my head.

_You're a senior in High School, Clove. _I scratched out an equation. _It's a matter of months before you turn eighteen._

_ It's TV. God. I shouldn't let this shit nag at me._

_ Eighteen years, you've been a living, breathing human being—and what d'you have to show for it?_

_ I'm New Jersey state Cross-Country champion. I have a 4.3 GPA and I'm going to Standford on full scholarship. In two weeks I'll be in San Diego, against the other 40 best runners in America._

_ But what difference does it make if you're heartless?_

My pencil practically broke in my hand.

_ You've never loved anyone before in your life._

I had to stop. The self-loathing needed to stop. Every member of the female species is programmed with an insecure, angsty side. I hadn't indulged in it for eighteen years, and I wasn't going to start now.

X can't equal 5 when there's a horizontal asymptote in the denominator—

But, god. I really am stupid.

XXX

**A/N: Muhahahah. Make of that what you will ;D**

**I'd like to wish the happiest of holidays to y'all, assuming we all don't die tomorrow. And, if we do, then I'm gonna get all sappy here and tell you guys that you're the best readers/reviewers an author could ever ask for.**

**(ahemthatbeingsaidleavearevie wahem)**

**Tease for tomorrow—it's high time we see our favorite blonde linebacker again.**

**xx Nina**


	5. Chapter Five: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

"I'm impressed—you're really on your game today."

I shrugged, putting the football under my arm and walking over to Finnick. He was standing with Gloss, whose eyes wandered in the direction of the girls' soccer team as they did their cooldown drills. Gloss gave some catcalls to them, and his sister Cashmere rolled her eyes at him. Her friends were giggling, and he broke out into a wide grin.

Gee, didn't _that _seem familiar?

"Yeah, well, I'll need to be if we want to win next week," I said, turning my attention to Finnick. He didn't give empty compliments.

"Ugh, you're right!" Finnick exclaimed. "The Irvington game, I completely forgot."

"Think you'll take a break from the pool and make some extra time on the field, Odair?" Gloss smirked as he turned to us. "I mean, I bet your club could use a week without you."

Say that to any other dual Athlete on the football team, and they'd flip. But Finnick put his helmet back on, and coolly said, "Not when my _real _season starts in three weeks." He clapped Gloss on the back. "But I appreciate your concern."

I had to stifle laughter as Finnick sauntered away, because this wasn't the first time Gloss had failed at pissing him off. _Just accept the fact that he's better than you, bro. _

There was "me" popular, there was Gloss popular, and then there was Finnick popular. He juggled varsity football in the fall and track in the spring while still being a year-round, nationally ranked swimmer. Football practice ended at six or seven, and after that he'd have to hit the pool for another two hours of swimming. Along with that, he had the whole "sweet jock" reputation going for him.

"I'll kick his ass if we lose," Gloss muttered. His face looked a little green to me.

_Or, instead of tormenting Finnick, you could focus your energy into training more. _"Yeah," I replied.

Gloss started to say something else, but stopped as the girl's cheerleading squad walked by. "Too bad Candice graduated. That girl was sex on a stick."

"Believe me, there are plenty of other girls like that." I bent down to retie my shoelace. _I would know, _I thought.

"Yeah, like Glimmer Rambin." I froze at hearing her name. "You still tapping that, Ludwig?"

"Um, yeah. She's my girlfriend."

"Oh. Right."

I rolled my eyes, not that he could see with the helmet I was wearing.

_You knew that I was dating her, prick._

"Shame. The body on that girl . . . _damn."_

I said the one thing that I knew would shut him up. "You know who else is hot? Your sister. Seriously, Cashmere's got the whole package."

He laughed as he shoved me, his snickering dripping with sarcasm. "If you get anywhere near my sister, I'll fucking kill you, Cato."

Coach Sanderson called him over with that, leaving me to watch by myself as the cheerleading squad walked by. Glimmer flashed me a smile and a quick wave, and I did the same.

_Please let it be real, please let it be real, please let it be real._

It'd been a year. I wasn't "that guy" anymore. I'd raised my grades, focused completely on football, and was set to play for USC in college. I didn't fuck around. My friends were all the same, minus one. But I was respectable now.

So why was it, that no matter how much time passed, I couldn't make myself love Glimmer Rambin?

XXX

**A/N: This chapter's delay has been brought to you by sunny Florida. Finally figured out how to get internet here, praise da lord.**

**As usual, thank you so much for the continuous love and support.**

**Tease for tomorrow: We see some more Glim-Glim.**

**xx Nina**


	6. Chapter Six: Glimmer

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Glimmer~

"Can you believe this our last game?"

"I know, right? Like where has the time gone?" Erin coated her lips in another layer of candy pink gloss. "Seriously, I feel like sophomore year was yesterday."

"And now we're seniors." Jen sighed, turning to her left and her right and paying careful attention to her movement in the mirror. She pouted, tugging at her uniform. "I think I need to go up a size. My boobs are too big."

I rolled my eyes. I was standing a few yards away from the two of them, not talking to them but still being able to hear every word of what they said. I pulled the maroon ribbon through my hair, turning my back to Erin and Jen.

"Girl, shut up. You're so skinny," Erin said.

"Nu-uh. Do you see this?" She was probably pointing at her hips. "My jeans, like, ripped in half the other day. At this rate I'll be a size four by Christmas."

"But you're like a C, right?"

"Well, yeah—"

"Oh, _honey, _don't worry about it!" Erin's voice went sugary high. "You totally work it, big boobs look good on you. And it's not like you're fat all over, unlike _some _people . . ."

And there she went—saying something loud enough for me to hear, because I knew it was directed at me, right at my double D's and size four jeans.

_Erin, sweetheart? Why don't you go fuck yourself? Because when I'm through with you, no one will want to do it for you._ Go back in time, and that's what I would've said twelve months ago.

I can't believe I ever called those girls my best friends. Actually, that's a lie. I can, because there was a point where I was at _that _level.

"Did you hear Marvel Quaid got into the Washington internship?"

Hearing the words as they came out of Jen's mouth, I pulled the ribbon so tight it just about ripped in half. _Bitch, you wouldn't._

"Ugh, _yes. _That's so retarded—boys that good looking shouldn't even be allowed to try out for that stuff."

"You think he's good looking?"

"_Hell _yes. Why, don't you?"

"I mean I guess. But he's, like, waaaay too smart for me."

Erin giggled. "Yeah, but I think it's hot."

Every bone in my body was telling me to turn and face them, to snap at them and call them out. To act without thinking_. _I wanted to be impulsive.

I double knotted my ribbon, clenching my teeth together. I snapped around to face them.

"Hey, ladies, what time did Coach say we had to be in the bleachers by—ten of?"

They both stared at me, not saying anything for a second. I knew that look well. It was the queen bee standard, the _why are you talking to me? _and the _who do you think you are?_ It was one of my favorites.

"Yeah," Jen deadpanned. Then I got the traditional up-and-down, and as they both glanced me over, I watched as their blank expressions became scowls. Apparently, having boobs and a butt wasn't in style anymore. It's not like I had any say—clearly, under Erin's ice-queen rule, spider-long legs and stick thin bodies were the new standard.

Oh, they wanted to see me dethroned,. And weren't those bitches just reveling in it.

I turned on my heel, and walked out the door. I thought of the one thing that always consoled me. _Erin's dating the biggest druggie on the hockey team, and Jen's a terminal slut. I have Cato Ludwig. I'm the one with Madison High school's golden boy._

I repeated that in my head._ I have Cato, I have Cato, I have Cato._

And for some reason, Erin's taunts about Marvel came back at me.

_I think he's hot._

I walked outside, slamming the door behind me. I was done listening to people talk about Marvel Quaid.

XXX

**A/N: Ho shit. You go, Glim-Glim.**

**One comment I've been getting a lot since I started this monstrosity: "This is Glato, not Clato!" Read between the lines and have patience, my sweets. This is most definitely Clato.**

**Wishing you all the merriest of Christmases/Hanukahs/whatever it is you celebrate in the wintertime. Tease for tomorrow? We see the ladies of the Madison cross-country team (*cough*Johannah*cough*Katniss)**

**xx Nina**


	7. Chapter Seven: Clove

And I've been a fool and I've been blind

I can never leave the past behind

I can see no way, I can see no way

I'm always dragging that horse around

Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound

Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground

So I like to keep my issues drawn

But it's always darkest before the dawn

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

"You have no business running in this pack, Fuhrman."

I shrugged, falling into stride with Katniss and Johanna. Our breath was visible in the crisp, early December air. Nobody from Madison was anywhere near as fast as me, but those two were the next best thing.

"I need to talk Footlocker strategy with you guys—"

"Oh, her royal highness is consoling the underlings?" Johanna shot.

Katniss ignored her. "I know you want to pace with Blake and Konrad, but don't trail them right away." Katniss was referencing the Florida and Texas state champs, who I'd be up against in San Diego that Saturday.

"Why not?"

"Southern girls always go out of the gate too fast, they're not used to hills so they crash by mile two," she said, panting as she ran. Everdeen took a look at her watch; we must've been right on target, because Katniss is a pacing machine.

"Lucky we have the Poconos as our backyard, Clover," Johanna said.

I nodded. The talking picked back up, because there wasn't ever such a thing as comfortable silence when it came to the three of us.

Johanna interjected after a bit of chit-chat. "You guys are going to Finnick's next weekend, right?"

"Yeah. Peeta's dragging me there," Katniss grimaced.

I turned to Johanna. "What's going on?"

"Oh, Finnick's throwing something." She waved a hand dismissively.

"Doesn't he throw something every weekend?"

"Yeah, well, this is the one thing that won't be a total snob-fest." She scrunched her nose. "It's holiday themed, not a football party. Thank god."

I nodded. Finnick had friends from a variety of different social echelons. Him and Johanna were tight, but she never got to see him in the fall because he was joined at the hip with his "lame-ass, good for nothing manwhore friends from football," as she put it.

"You should go," Katniss said to me. "And invite Marvel."

"Yeah, that kid needs to learn how to cut loose." Johanna pointed a finger as if to scold me. "This weekend might be his last chance."

I rolled my eyes. "I'll ask him about it."

Washington was last week's news, and last week's victory to celebrate; now, the reality of it was dawning on me. In a month, I'd be saying goodbye to my best friend. And of the three of us, I wasn't the only one that would have to say goodbye to someone.

"Don't miss Mellarky too much, Katniss."

"Bitch." She shoved me in the curb, and we snickered all the way to mile four.

I thought about Finnick's party as Johanna went off about Enobaria Golding, her longtime mortal enemy. Finnick did track in the spring, and we were all friends with him. Peeta also swam in the winter, and through the two of them, Katniss and Finnick became pretty close. It was only this fall that I started to get invited to his ragers, but I never went because I knew it was—like Johanna said—a snobfest.

And when I realized the possibility, my stomach dropped. Cato might be there.

XXX

**A/N: Sorry that the formatting of this is so bizarre, I'm on vacation and internet is nonexistant at our hotel, so I'm writing this on good ol' Gramps' computer. Hope you guys enjoyed-check back tomorrow to see more of our favorite blonde couple. Let me know in the reviews how you predict this story will flesh out.**

xx Nina


	8. Chapter Eight: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

The last time Clove and I had spoken was the December of our junior year. Avoiding her was easy enough—all of her classes were APs, and it's not like we had to deal with each other after school. My deal with her was that I'd be with Glimmer, and that being her boyfriend and giving her what she wanted would protect Marvel.

I knew what I was getting myself into. The one thing I didn't account for was the one thing that made all the difference.

"Cato? Are you even listening to me?"

I snapped my attention away from our school's TV monitor. _Clove Fuhrman—25__th__ best in the Nation _was plastered across the screen. Glimmer was staring at me, and the look in her eyes brought me back to reality.

"No, I wasn't planning on going to Finnick's this weekend," I answered hollowly. "It doesn't seem like my scene."

"Well, who else is going?"

"I don't know. Peeta, some his track friends—doesn't fucking matter."

_25__th__ best in the nation. _Of course Footlocker had been that past Saturday—how the hell did I forget?

"I kind of want to go."

I groaned. "Why, Glim?"

"Because we never get out anymore."

"We go out all the time—"

"Yeah, and it's always with the same conceited assholes," she snapped.

Ahh. Okay, so I could sympathize.

"Please, Cato? You're friends with Finnick, right?"

"I mean, I guess. But what's wrong with our close friends?"

She laughed starkly. "Gloss and Brutus? You're kidding—they're terrible. And _don't—"_ she snapped, cutting me off before I could interject—"even get me _started _on Enobaria."

I shut my mouth. Point two for Glimmer.

"Alright, we'll go," I grumbled. She threw her arms around me, squealing a little. "But if you get shitfaced, I'm not holding your hair back."

"Yeah, yeah," she said, rolling her eyes and planting a kiss on my cheek. She ran off to class after that, leaving me to stare at the monitor.

_Clove Furhman—25__th__ best in the Nation._

I hadn't spoken to her in a year, and I hated it.

_Well, who else is going?_

_ Peeta, some of his track friends . . . _That'd probably include Katniss. Which would _definitely _include Johanna. Which meant . . .

The thought crossed my mind before I could stop it.

"C'mon, Cato," I said to myself. "Don't get your hopes up."

I turned away from the TV. I walked down the hall. I trained my eyes on the ground, and repeated the same lie over and over again.

_I love Glimmer, I love Glimmer, I love Glimmer._

XXX

**A/N: Two reviews for the last chapter? Tsk, tsk. You guys sure know how to wound a girl's ego.**

**Be a friend, leave a review.**

**And for those of you that are Gale/Madge shippers, I'm posting a one-shot tomorrow centered around that pairing. The title is **_**Sharing Joy and Misery. **_**(Also inspired by Flo. Bahahahahah.) Easily one of my favorite things I've ever written, and I don't say that lightly.**

**After that, I think I'll do daily updates for **_**Shake it Out.**_** Startin' out 2013 strong, whuddup.**

**Tease for tomorrow? First of three party-centric chappies.**

**xx Nina**


	9. Chapter Nine: Glimmer

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Glimmer~

"I feel like I'm in Inception," I slurred.

Cato reacted a minute too late. "Yeahhh. I feel ya." He was also stumbling over his words. _Good, _I thought, _I'm not the only one._

A dream inside of a dream. That's what I felt like.

Correction: that's how _drunk _I was.

"Glimmer?"

"Hmmm?"

"Why are we still here?"

I smiled, tilted my head in his direction and pointing my beer bottle at him. "Be-_cause."_

"Because why?"

"Awwwh, c'mon, let's just have some fun. We never have fun anymore."

Also not true.

He shrugged. "Eh! I guess."

Drifting around the room after that night _definitely _felt like a dream. I didn't know anyone. Well, I knew everyone, but I wasn't _friends _with them. The parties Gloss threw were with the same people I'd been hanging out with since Freshman year. Track kids? Forget it.

And then, my eyes landed on just the blonde haired brainiac I wanted to see.

I called out his name. He didn't turn around, my voice drowned out by the noise of the room. I took a long drink from my beer bottle. _Liquid courage, _I mused.

As I tried to push through the throng of people, a bottle of Svedka was passed to me. Almost as if I was on autopilot, I chugged it down. I passed the bottle back to whoever handed it to me (Fresh? Mesh? Whatever, couldn't remember his name), and stumbled over.

_Marvel!_

It took me a few tries before I realized I hadn't said it aloud.

"Marvel." I said. He didn't hear me. "Maaaaaaaarvel!"

He turned around. He looked me right in the eye.

And, as he did, I felt all of that Svedka come back up.

I sprinted to the bathroom. I retched into the toilet, and normally I would've tried to keep quiet, but I couldn't for the life of me. Every time I felt like I was finished, I poked my head back over the edge of the toilet bowl for another round. _Ughhh._

I wasn't anywhere near done when someone else poked their head inside.

"Hey, are you alr—?" She stopped talking, because she must've realized who I was.

Everything still felt like a dream inside a dream. I really hoped it was, because Clove Fuhrman was staring at me.

XXX

**A/N: Bahahahha. Cliff hangers.**

**15 reviews for the last chapter? Oh, my god, you guys are seriously the best. Thank you so much. Let's aim for somewhere around that number this time, eh? ;D**

**Hope you guys had a lovely New Year. Check out **_**Sharing Joy and Misery **_**if you haven't already, I'll see you guys tomorrow with an update.**

**xx Nina**


	10. Chapter Ten: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

I wanted to slam the door as fast as I opened it. I'd figured it was one of my teammates getting sick, and _not _Glimmer Rambin. But I stared, my mouth agape, not moving as she looked back at me.

"Oh, goody," she said hoarsely.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

Glimmer threw her arms up. "Well . . . 's a party, right? Whassa party without—" She stopped talking, and I looked away as I heard the mangled sounds of her vomiting. I couldn't shake the image of her vomit covered chin, tangled hair and smudgy makeup from my mind. Glimmer never looked this disheveled.

I waited until the sounds of her retching died down a bit. "Who invited you?" I asked.

I could see the gears turning in her intoxicated head. "Don't fucking remember," she drawled. Then she doubled back over for another round.

The smell didn't hit me until then. And as it did, I felt like I was going to get sick myself. I bolted from the bathroom. The sounds of her puking echoed in my mind, and for the love of God, Glimmer was at a _fucking track party. _It didn't make any sense. She only associates herself with the most exclusive, stuck up kids in her grade, why in the hell would she—

I ran right into someone, and it jarred me back to reality. The drink he was holding spilled all over me as we both stumbled backward.

"Fucking hell-!"

I felt immediate fury wash over me, and I snapped up to give the dumbass a piece of my mind.

And then I did a double take. My chest seized.

Finnick's house was dark and crowded, and my vision wasn't the best, but there was no mistaking who the hulking blonde figure in front of me was.

Cato's eyes widened, and I saw the realization hit him. "Clove—"

"What the hell are you doing here?" I prayed my voice wasn't as shaky as I felt.

His brow furrowed, like it always did when he was confused. "Is she in there?" he asked.

"What—"

"Glimmer, is she in there?"

Even in the shock that'd overcome me, I could tell he was drunk. His words were slurring and he was having a hard time standing up. "Yeah, dumbass." He tried shoving past me, but I grabbed on to his arm, pulling him back. "Don't. It's nasty, she's throwing up her guts."

"Clove, lemme the fuck in, I gotta get her home—"

"That's for sure!"

"_No," _he whined, "You don't get it."

"Get what?"

"Marvel's here. That's why _she's _here."

_Marvel?_ What in the—

And that's when I felt blood boil, because the entire thing was a sick joke, it had to be. _So that's what you're playing at, huh?_ _'Oh, sure, why don't we just crash a track party to give Clove and Marvel hell, it'll be so fucking amusing—'_

I was ready to take a swing, my teeth grit with something spiteful on the tip of my tongue. But Cato kept looking at me intently, the way he used to, and I could tell that he wasn't lying.

"Why's Marvel suddenly so important?" I demanded.

"I don't know. But we need to leave, like now—"

"Who drove?"

"Me."

I shook my head. "Uh-uh, no way. You're as messed up as she is."

"Well, _yeah, _but she can't stay—"

"I'll drive her home!" I snapped, "Okay?"

The furrow in his brow deepened. "But why-?"

I'd just about had it with Cato Ludwig. I was done listening to his drunken ramblings, done trying to make sense of what they all meant, so I gave him the best glare I could and said, "I'm doing you a favor, Cato. Just go with it."

"Wha-?" He stopped talking as I glared him down. And, for once, Cato Ludwig picked his battles. He started to nod his head. "Okay. Okay."

He turned on his heel, and like that, he traversed the room. As if our conversation was nothing.

My heart was pounding out of my chest.

The Cato I remembered was combative and sarcastic, especially when under the influence.

I hadn't spoken to Cato since last year, but this conversation, in all of his concern and self control and just plain _not _the same quarterback I punched in the mouth last year—

He was drunk, so I should that this interaction with a grain of salt. Who knew if he'd even remember this conversation in the morning? I was sober beyond belief. Now I was wishing for a shot of vodka just so I could process the entire thing, and maybe get my pulse to stop racing.

_Drive Glimmer home, Clove. Focus on that. Stop thinking so much._

I walked back into the bathroom. I put my arm around Glimmer for support, helping her up and hauling her ass out of Finnick's house. And all the while, I tried to block out the one pressing question: _why am I even bothering?_

I decided then and there.

"I fucking hate Cato Ludwig."

I couldn't get him off of my mind.

XXX

**A/N: My oh my did this chappie go under intensive revision. Hopefully this was spot on.**

**You guys have been spectacular with reviews. If we can keep this up, **_**Shake It Out **_**might become my most popular fic on FF. (Which I'm not even letting myself hope for since it's still a longshot, but still, a girl can dream . . . *le sigh*)**

**Thank you all so so so so so so^34839 much.**

**Tease for tomorrow? The car ride (:O)**

**xx Nina**


	11. Chapter Eleven: Glimmer

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Glimmer~

"You live on the corner of Addison, right?"

_Ugh. _My throat was burning. It tasted like a combination of Bud Light and dinner. I chomped even harder on the gum Clove'd given me, washing it down with her water.

"Hey," she said, snapping her fingers at me. "Glimmer. Addison, yes or no?"

"Yeah," I croaked. I felt disgusting. A touch less drunk, thanks to the vomit, but still disgusting. "It's the white house on the right."

She turned off the freeway, slowing down as we entered pristine Suburbia. "Lots of white picket fences here," she muttered.

I nodded. "Yeah. No double door mansions, though."

She rolled her eyes. Oh, right. Clove lived in one of those.

I turned and took a good look at her. Her eyes were trained on the road, so thankfully she couldn't do the same. _She still looks like a boy, _I grudgingly thought to myself. I guess that's what happens when you're five and a half feet tall and you run seventy miles a week—you get skinny and strong, but boobs and an ass become nonexistent.

She was clenching the steering wheel so hard, her knuckles were turning right.

"Somebody angry?" I croaked.

"Go back to sleep, Glimmer."

The spite in her voice was hard to miss.

My drunken brain started functioning as we pulled up to my house. The entire thing started to seem off. The gum. The water bottle. Cleaning me up and driving me home.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked her.

The car pulled to a stop. She didn't say anything for a minute. "It's reluctant, believe me."

"I don't get it. You hate me."

"True. But I couldn't let Ludwig give you a ride—you're both trashed."

"You talked to Cato?"

She nodded, gritting her teeth and looking to the ground.

"How'd that go? Y'know, being ex fuck buddies and all . . ."

"Hey," she said, irritated, "I just drove your incredibly drunk ass home. You owe me." She added, almost as an afterthought, "And we were never fuck buddies."

"Eh, you're right. I knew that." I took another swig from her water bottle. I cleared my throat, my head still foggy. "'S almost too bad though."

"Why?"

"'Cause you were in love with him." Even with her stunned reaction, I kept talking. "I bet you still are."

"I wouldn't fall for a guy that's in love with another girl. I have more respect for myself than that," she shot back.

She really was a shitty liar. So shitty, I laughed right at her.

"Cato isn't in love with me," I said. My words cut through the air like a knife. Her face, which was just twisted with anger, was suddenly unreadable. "We both know it."

"Then why do you—"

"Love him?" I sighed. I debated whether or not to say what was about to come out of my mouth, and in the end, good judgment doesn't stand a chance against alcohol.

_Might as well lay it all out. _

"'S funny. We actually have something in common."

"What're you—"

"I can only watch my boyfriend gawkat you _so_ many times," I started, rolling the window down and spitting out my gum, "before deciding that I can't fucking take it anymore."

Clove Fuhrman is a genius. I knew I wouldn't have to repeat myself.

Good. I didn't think I could admit it a second time around.

"You're drunk," she said. She got out of the car, and helped walk me to the front door.

I felt light on my feet for the first time in a while.

Or maybe that was just the alcohol.

"Yeah, and I'm telling you the truth."

"Get some sleep," she shoved me inside. "And tell Cato that you got home safe."

She turned on her heel, walking to the car. I called out to her, "You tell him. He's your problem to deal with now."

Underneath the drunken slurs, my voice was thick with giddiness.

The last thing I saw before slamming the door was an angry, but unmistakably beet red Clove.

XXX

**A/N: Muhahahahha. Make of that what you will :D**

**Fanfiction (greater than sign) Art History essay. **

**I love all of you so, so much. The response this Fic has gotten has me over the moon. Thanks a ton to everyone who's reviewed, I'm blessed to have readers like you.**

**Tease for tomorrow? Clove's perspective.**

**xx Nina**


	12. Chapter Twelve: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

Waking up that next morning was a shock, considering my parents were home.

"Morning, sweetheart!"

"How was your night?"

My dad was dressed casually for once, drinking coffee over the Sunday paper. Mom smiled and flipped pancakes, and all in all, the kitchen seemed so _peachy._

I hated it.

"What're you guys doing here?" I demanded.

"Well, neither of us are on call today," he said. "So your mother and I decided that, maybe . . ."

"We could spend the day together," she finished, her face falling as she looked at my expression. "As a family."

My dad kept beaming at me. It seemed so fake.

_A family? What fucking family?_

"I'm out of here," I said. I turned on my heel, ignoring their protests and shouting back, "I'll be back in six miles!"

Bizarre. That's the only word I could think of. In between Finnick's party and the car ride with Glimmer and my parents acting like time with me was a priority, my weekend was shaping to be bizarre.

I didn't run on Sundays. It was my day off. But I didn't want to think, so the first thing I did that morning was lace up my Sauconys.

Six miles. _I'll run down to Fernwood. Yeah, that's about six miles roundtrip. That's a tough trail, though, I'll have to take it easy . . ._

Glimmer Rambin's words were ringing in my head.

_ I can only watch my boyfriend gawk at you so many times, before deciding that I can't fucking take it anymore._

Yeah, but what the hell did that _mean? _"You're still with him, bitch," I muttered under my breath. She wasn't- no, she _definitely _wasn't- plotting their breakup. Or was she?

And what the hell was with that accusation about me loving Cato? I'd kissed the boy twice in my lifetime. Besides, that was _ages _ago, she didn't possibly think- I mean, it's not like two months is enough time to fall in love with someone. Cato Ludwig was practically a stranger to me now, we hadn't spoken since—(oh, wait) well, so maybe he talked to me last night, but that didn't count. He was drunk, more drunk than I'd ever seen him in my life. And Cato _wouldn't _just act like our conversation was nothing, like he did at the party, considering his feelings for me—

I felt like running right into the road, hoping to _God _that a Honda would hit me and kill me on the spot. Fucking hell, he _doesn't have feelings for me anymore!_ Not that it makes any difference. Maybe he did, but that was a long time ago. And so what if he'd made an empty promise about our future, about being with Glimmer until she stopped loving him, about becoming a better man for me—_ugh, _such bullshit. All of it.

I had to stop taking them both so seriously. They both got drunk off their asses last night, and to top it all off, allegedly Glimmer had gone after _Marvel—_

Oh.

"Goddamnit," I muttered under my breath, the _Eureka! _hitting me like a train. I doubled back, only having run out about a mile. I retraced my steps exactly. Only instead of running up the path of my house, I went to the green one next door.

This shit needed to be dialogued with Marvel Quaid.

XXX

**A/N: Considering we haven't seen Marvel in 123782734287821 years, it's high time we brought him back, no?**

**101 reviews. Ghewruhseiuhsdi. I love all of you so much.**

**Tease for next time? Maaaaaaarvel!**

**xx Nina**


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Marvel

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Marvel~

"What if I told you I talked to Glimmer Rambin last night?"

I wiped the crud out of my eyes, because the words I was hearing didn't match the face. Yep, it was Clove, who'd barged into my house and threw her jacket down, not even waiting to catch her breath as she made a beeline for the kitchen.

"Well, good morning to you too."

"You won't believe what she said to me. I mean she was completely shitfaced, so every word of it was nonsense—"

"Clove—"

"—and she kept bringing up stuff that happened last year, so—"

_"Clove." _She stopped talking, but kept rifling through my fridge. I could guess she was looking for a water bottle, based on her running get-up. "Breathe, woman." She glared at me, but obliged. "D'you want some waffles?"

"Marvel, this is hardly any time for—"

"You're going to have to slow the fuck down if you expect me to understand you." I pulled out a chair from the kitchen table, pointing at it. "Sit. Here, I'll get you breakfast."

She was reluctant at first, but once I brought her a plate of food I could tell she was famished. I sat across from her, and she talked in between mouthfuls, gorging herself.

She told me about last night, and how she'd found Glimmer throwing up in the bathroom, only to walk out and find herself face to face with Cato.

"Is that the first time you've talked to him since—"

"Yeah. Last year," she said. Her expression was unrecognizable, in between the mouthful of strawberries and her fixated gaze on them. "Anyway, so he told me that the reason he and Glimmer were there was because _you_ were there, and Glimmer was trying to make a pass at you. None of that made any sense so I didn't ask for the gory details, and instead of letting Ludwig give her a ride home in his drunken stupor, I offered to."

Her words hit me like a ton of bricks. "Glimmer wanted to get with me last night?"

"Yeah, brainless."

"That doesn't make any sense, she doesn't like me. She had her chance last year, if she wanted to she would've—"

"I don't get it either. Lemme finish."

I sighed. "Okay."

"So I'm driving her home, and she's _trashed. _I pull up to her house and she makes some snide comment about me and Cato, saying we were fuck buddies or whatever—"

"Were you?" I interrupted.

The panic in my voice must've been obvious, because Clove's scowl was gigantic. "No! God, how can even ask that?" She took a long gulp of water before prattling on again. "Anyway, I tell her that we never were, and then she accused me of being in love with him, which I never _was _and never _will be, _so I tell her that Cato loves her just to shut her up, and that even if I did have feelings for him I would never let them mean anything because I respect myself more than to go after a guy that's taken." She only stopped talking to take a breather. "To which _she _said, 'well, I can only watch my boyfriend gawk at you so many times before deciding I can't take it anymore.'" She puts on a falsetto, mimicking Glimmer. "It's so fucking . . . ugh!"

"Wait, _what?"_ is all I can manage.

She leans back in her chair. "Ridiculous, I know."

"Back up—she's saying she doesn't like Cato anymore?"

"I mean, I guess. But she was drunk, and you can trust this girl just about as far as you can throw her—"

"But it'd make sense, considering how she tried to hookup with me last night."

I felt like kicking myself, because the look Clove gave me made me want to crawl into a closet and hide. "No, Marvel! She was drunk, no one's really themselves when they're drunk. Everything she said was bullshit!"

Her voice was rising, and she didn't even realize it. "Okay, fine. So what'd she mean about Cato gawking at you?"

"I don't know!" She threw her arms up in frustration. "I don't think it means anything!"

"Clove, you need to calm down—"

"Seriously, Marvel, this entire thing is so stupid, I don't even know why we deal with them."

I straight up laughed at her. "We don't deal with them! We haven't dealt with them in a year! I haven't talked to Cato since after him and Glimmer got together, and you haven't talked to either of them either, right?" She nodded. "Okay, so there. I don't get why you're getting so worked up about this. It doesn't matter if it's bullshit, because it doesn't mean anything to us anymore."

She scoffed. "Maybe not to me, but to you it still does."

"What—"

"Don't act like you don't still have feelings for Glimmer," she said. "I know you still talk to her a little, I've seen you in the hallways. And I just saw how you lit up at the possibility that she doesn't love Cato anymore."

"Yeah, of course I lit up at that, because I don't think they should be together!" I checked myself before saying another word, realizing how heated this was getting. "Clove, what're you trying to figure out, exactly? I don't get why you're here—all you're doing is arguing everything I'm trying to say."

"Alright, I'm sorry," she snapped. I rolled my eyes and gave her a look, and she finally sighed and put her hands up in surrender. "Tell me what you think, and I'll hear you out. I'm just frustrated."

"Well, I think you were right about one thing—Cato doesn't love you." I don't even stop to test her reaction, I just keep talking. "I think Glimmer's trying to get with other guys because she's been dating the same person for close to a year, and she's bored. She finally has everything she wants, she's proven she can get the alpha male, and now she wants to mess around again."

"But—"

"Don't interrupt me," I snapped. "I used to be best friends with both of them, I know how they work. Glimmer always wants what she can't have, and Cato strung her along for such a long time that she fell for him. Now that he's in love with her, all of the fun's over."

"But he's not in love with her!" Clove shouted.

I sighed, not wanting to break it to Clove, but finally realizing that that was where her frustration was coming from. She felt something for him, and hearing that he loved her gave her false hope. And as her best friend, I cared about Clove too much to let her believe it. "Listen, I know this is hard for you to hear—but he picked Glimmer over you. He's in love with her. I'm sorry, but you can't let yourself believe anything Glimmer says to you."

I expected her to be angry with me. I didn't expect her to turn white as a sheet of paper.

All of the color drained from her face, and I know I've said the worst possible thing.

"Oh, Clove." I tried to soften my voice. "That came out wrong—"

"Marvel." She wavered as she said it. "There's something you should probably know."

I didn't have any clue as to what was going to come out of her mouth, so I didn't even have time to brace myself for the worst as she started talking.

"Cato's only dating Glimmer to keep her away from you." She fiddled with the rim of her water glass, and for some reason, that's where my eyes jumped when her words hit me. "When he found out you were in love with her, he knew he couldn't be with me because Glimmer would go running back to you for comfort, and—"

"The fucking_ hell-_?"

"Please, just hear me out—"

"You've both kept this from me for a year?" My blood was boiling. "What, you think I'm weakling that can't handle a girl—"

"No, you can't handle her, at least not this girl! She's an insecure, manipulative skank, and you would've let her walk all over you!" She slammed her fist on the table, standing up. "Cato did what he did to _protect _you! You would've been miserable with Glimmer Rambin in your life like that, so he sacrificed his friendship with you to make sure that didn't happen!"

Gone was the colorless Clove I'd seen all of thirty seconds ago. She was flushed and angry, practically spitting in my face as she shouted, and that's when I _knew. _This was the truth. Even someone as smart as Clove couldn't fabricate it, because it was the only thing that made sense.

Well, one thing was for sure—there was much more at play here than I'd originally thought.

I didn't stop Clove as she got up and stormed out my house, slamming the door behind her. Instead, I fished around for my cellphone, calling a number I hadn't used in ages.

My heart raced as I did it.

"Cato, it's Marvel. We need to talk."

XXX

**A/N: HELL YEAH BOY. Longest chapter so far.**

**Sorry this took a little longer than usual, but I'm getting back on track with updates. Hope you guys enjoyed this—let me know in the reviews how you think this will ultimately turn out, because right now I'm still dabbling with a couple of different endings, LOL.**

**Hey look Pretty Little Liars was on tonight.**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for tomorrow? The conversation. My oh my oh my.**


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

"Isn't a coffee date a little public?"

I didn't make an effort to hide my irritation. Marvel picked up on it and gave me an eye-roll, practically slamming my cappuccino into my fist. He opted for a Gingerbread latte, but I knew that before even seeing the cup. When you're friends with someone for close to a decade, you pick up on these things.

"Well, y'know . . . witnesses."

His words hung in the air. We both knew what he was referencing.

"Marvel—"

"I wanted to talk to you in person," he interrupted, "because I'm done with last year's bullshit."

"A phone call would've worked."

"Yeah, but I wouldn't be able to tell if you were lying." He nursed a sip from his coffee, and looked at a spot on the wall, until he glanced back at me a minute later.

We used to get coffee every Sunday together. Hangover treats, we'd muse.

"Alright," I said. I stretched my legs out. "What d'you want to know?"

"I know the truth."

I racked my brain, but nothing came to me. "What?"

"About you and Glimmer. Clove filled me in, she told me everything. I know that you've been dating her to keep her away from me. And I know that she tried to get with me last night, so the question is—"

"Clove did _what?"_

"Careful, Cato, wouldn't want to break a mug."

I looked at my hand, and—sure enough—my knuckles were white.

"Why now?" I asked through grit teeth.

"That's my question. Seems like everything's coming back to the surface, right? And y'know, considering we resolved this a good twelve months ago—"

I snorted. "Let's cut the bullshit, Marvel. We never resolved anything."

He raised an eyebrow. "Okay, glad we're on the same page . . . so start talking."

"Excuse me?"

"You want to cut the bullshit?" He leaned in and narrowed his eyes on me. "I do too. I—" He groaned, tripping over his words. Marvel Quaid was nationally ranked in debate. He was about as eloquent as they made came. "I need to know the truth. The _whole _truth. This needs to be fixed, and the sooner the better since I'm leaving in three weeks."

"Why should I—"

"Are you honestly happy with yourself right now? With the way things've turned out between the four of us?"

"I mean, considering I have a 4.0 this year and I'm playing football for my dream school, then _yeah, _I'm pretty fucking pleased with myself."

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about your relationship."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't turn this into some melodrama. High school relationships are all fucking insignificant. You really think I'd feel down about dating the hottest girl in school?"

He didn't answer right away, and it was long enough to make it unsettling.

"If they're so insignificant, then why throw away a lifelong friendship for the girl you love?"

I took a minute to work that through my head. Over and over again.

"I don't love her."

"Of course you don't."

"Glimmer's my girlfriend, what the fuck d'you want me to tell you—"

"The truth."

My laughter was the furthest thing from amused. He wasn't going to drop this, not for the life of him. That's Marvel Quaid. The comment he'd gotten on his report card from third grade described him best—_"He has a heart of gold and always wants the best for everyone, and when he undertakes a task, he becomes fixated on the end goal to the point of obsession."_

How I dealt with that for ten years, I don't even know.

Oh wait. I'd snap.

"I don't think you can handle the truth, Marvel."

"Stop worrying about my feelings." His voice was rising louder than necessary. "Stop trying to be the white knight. You're not the good guy, and to be completely honest, Clove doesn't want a white knight."

"This isn't about Clove—"

"This is completely about Clove. It's about all of us." The look on his face was incredulous. "Lemme ask you something—d'you miss being friends with me? Do you still have feelings for her?"

I waited before answering. "Okay. You have my attention."

He kicked back in his chair, and surveyed me. If I were him, I'd probably do the same. I didn't take this shit from anyone, usually. I ran the show. I was short-tempered. I was a jackass.

Now, I'd given Marvel Quaid something to work with, and this was more than he ever bargained for.

"Good. Now you better be listening, because here's what we're going to do . . ."

XXX

**A/N: And now things get interesting ;D**

**And update a day keeps the doctor away, so get excited.**

**I'll probably be done with **_**Shake it Out**_** in the near future, so I'm already starting some new projects. Vote on which one you'd next like to see from me.**

**My reviewers are so freaking amazing. Readers, you're just okay. (I kid.)**

**xx Nina**


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

"What's got you so worked up, tiger?"

I didn't answer, pushing with every ounce of strength I had to raise the bar. Up, down, back up, and back down. Twelve times over. Johanna was spotting me on the bench press, mocking me.

I screamed out as I finished my last rep. Distance runners, especially females, aren't supposed to be able to bench their weight.

"I'm angry," I spat. My arms burned.

"Good, we'll need it for Saturday." She grabbed me by the shoulder, shoving me off the bench. I helped her take a good 40 pounds off the bar before she went in to do her sets.

"Normally, I wouldn't ask why, but I can't have you ripping a tricep."

I groaned. Up down, back up, and back down. Johanna did her reps. "Marvel's being an ass."

"Really?"

"Yeah. And he's leaving after Christmas, so it sucks."

She waited until she was done before responding. "What'd he do wrong?"

"He hasn't talked to me in a week."

"Why?"

"Because I'm giving him the silent treatment."

Johanna laughed. "Get over yourself, Clove."

"He deserves it. He's a stubborn, ungrateful little bitch, and his priorities are completely fucked up."

"Huh. Wouldn't have guessed that, considering he's going to Yale on scholarship."

It'd gotten to a point in our friendship when Johanna's snarkiness had no effect on me. "Believe me, he's a lot stupider than he seems." _Yeah, stupid enough to fall in love with someone like Glimmer Rambin._

She put her hands up. "I don't want to know." We left the weight room, saying goodbye to our Coach and making our way to the locker room. "He'll come around, though. Marvel's a softie. Unlike you."

"I hate you."

"Yeah, yeah. Are you still going to his Christmas thing or what?"

I sighed. "Yeah. Our parents are best friends. And Katniss will be there, so at least I'll have a buffer." I turned to her. "You want to come?"

She smirked. "Remember when the three of us used to hate each other?"

"I mean, I still do. I just said so."

She laughed. "Alright, fine. But I better not have to wear a dress."

"If worst comes to worst, you can borrow one of mine, Johanna."

I gave her a ride home, and found myself stuck at the Hilldale intersection for close to ten minutes. _Why does traffic have to be such a bitch? _I cranked up the music, trying to drown out my thoughts and distract myself from how long I was waiting. It was a good thing Johanna was out of the car, because I would've taken out my frustration on her.

Actually, I take that back. Now that I thought about it, I never fought with her, ever. Weird.

"Fuck you, Marvel," I said to myself. I hated that he wasn't being the bigger man and apologizing already, even though he probably didn't have anything to apologize for. Other than the fact that he wasn't apologizing. Which meant I had to do it. Damnit.

Florence and the Machine's _Spectrum _started playing, and I belted along with her as the traffic _finally _started to pick up. I flashed back to May, when Marvel and I saw her on tour. We'd gotten hopelessly lost in the New York subway and had to take a cab from Queens just to get back to Penn Station. At that point, we'd missed our train home, so we spent an hour reading _Fifty Shades of Grey _and mocking it at the Hudson Bookseller's before boarding the next one.

Back in the fall, we'd talked about seeing her again. She was going to be in Boston over our spring break, so we devised a whole plan to road trip up there. But with him in Washington and all, now it looked like that wasn't going to happen.

Screw it. I was going to miss him like hell. But that didn't change how mad I was about this whole debacle with Glimmer Rambin—

"Holy shit!"

I slammed my foot on the brakes, realizing the red light in front of me a split second too late. Because now I had my answer to why Glimmer had gone after him. This was all resurfacing just now because Marvel Quaid was _leaving, _and there were still too many loose ends between the four of us.

This entire thing was his whole damn fault.

Fuck him.

XXX

**A/N: This chapter should be more appropriately named "Fuck You, Marvel Quaid."**

**Get excited for the next few chapters, they're going to be big.**

**Go to my profile page and vote on the next fic you want me to write, because I've been bitten by the inspiration bug.**

**Also, here's a friendly reminder to leave a review. Please. We're all starving artists here, let's be honest.**

**HeylookIreferencedFlohowsurp rising.**

**xx Nina**


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

"Well, don't you look handsome."

I turned around, the voice matching exactly the face I thought it did. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and the same angular features as me. Lyme laughed as I ran forward, my expression probably being somewhere in between a mixture of disbelief and dumb joy.

"You weren't supposed to come home today!"

"Well, surprise. Happy to see me, little bro?" she said, pulling away from my hug and giving me a noogie. I slapped her hand away.

"Don't mess with the hair."

"Yeah, yeah." She laughed, throwing herself on to the foot of my bed. "What are you so dressed up for?"

"I'm going to the Quaids' Christmas party."

"Ahh. Tell Loanne and Steve I say hi."

"What, aren't you coming?"

"Nahhh. Emma's having a rave tonight, I think I'll pass on black tie and hors d'oeuvres."

I laughed. It's hard to believe how much less uptight college made her. "Is Los Angeles treating you well?"

"You mean constant sand and sun? No. I hate it."

"I'm jealous."

"Next year you won't have to be. We'll be in the same neck of the woods."

I smiled, fishing around through my drawer until I found the wrapped box I was looking for. "Here, Merry Christmas," I said as I tossed it to her.

She opened the box, and she didn't bother containing the smile as it stretched across her face. "Tiffany?" She held up the bracelet, raising a brow. "Did you use dad's credit card?"

"Nahhh. I'm trying this whole 'be nice to people' thing."

She laughed. "I don't believe that for a second, but long as I get jewelry, I'm not complaining." She took a minute to admire her bracelet before turning back to me. "Did you get Glimmer something this nice?"

"Pfft. Hell no."

"So are you breaking up with her?"

"Hey, I thought we agreed years ago not to pry into each others' personal life. We both know how badly that turned out _last _time."

She turned all kinds of crimson, most definitely remembering that one time during her senior year of high school when I walked in on her and her boyfriend. "You suck at being nice."

"Don't act like you didn't miss me."

She didn't say anything for a minute. "I can't believe you two are still together."

"What, you're surprised that I can hold on to a girl?"

"No, I'm surprised that she could hold on to you."

"Really?"

She thought that for a second. "Well, I guess not entirely." She trailed off.

"Go on," I said.

"I always knew there'd be a game-changer, you couldn't be a manwhore for forever." It didn't matter how good natured she sounded, because she was dead serious. "I just didn't think it'd be Glimmer."

When we were Freshmen in high school, Lyme was a senior. She ran varsity track and cross country and was fluent in three languages by then. She knew Clove, and she knew her as an anti-social, slightly psychotic runner.

Hard to believe that same girl practically babysat my girlfriend last weekend.

"Glimmer isn't a game-changer," I said to her. "Don't worry about me, I've got it all figured out."

"You could do better, Cato."

We both laughed at that.

"Yeah, well. I don't think you'd find the game-changer to be a step up."

"Oh really?" She leaned in. "Who is she?"

I smirked. "Assuming tonight goes well, you'll find out soon enough."

XXX

**A/N: I figures that Cato learned his flirty ways from a super-cool older sis, right? **

**Tease for tomorrow? The Quaids' party and some truth. Get ready, it's going to be interesting.**

**Thanks a million for all of the reviews, love you guys xx**

**Nina**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Marvel

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Marvel~

_Hey, where are you?_

_Where are you?_

_Damnit, Marvel, text me. I want to apologize._

I craned my neck, looking around the room. Clove must've been either down the hall or in the living room, because I hadn't seen her yet and she was trying to track me down. I checked my phone again, swearing under my breath and sending another message to Cato. No response.

"Quaid," I heard someone hiss.

I spun around, and when I saw it was Cato, I felt a mixture of relief and anger. "Where the hell have you been?"

"Sorry, I got stuck at home, Lyme-"

"D'you have any idea how hard it's been dodging Clove?" I snapped, keeping my voice down.

"What, is she here?"

"Yeah, and if you want this to work, we can't have her getting in the way." I sighed, checking my watch. "Did you see her when you came in?"

"No, I came straight here."

"Okay, good, that means she's in the living room." I took another glance around the room one last time before looking to Cato. "I need thirty minutes. Keep her busy, tell her you haven't seen me, just make sure that she doesn't leave."

"Why, what difference would that make? She'd probably just go home-"

"Damnit, Cato, stop forgetting that she's genius. She'll figure out soon enough what I'm up to and the entire thing will fall apart."

"Okay, then how am I supposed to distract her without making it obvious?" he shot, irritated.

"I don't know! But you're _you,_ so that should be enough!"

I didn't wait for his response as I stormed out. I took a glance into the living room just before walking out, my house already full of my parents' friends and kids from my grade. Sure enough, Clove and Johanna were in a corner, talking and completely oblivious of me.

"Perfect," I muttered. I shut the door behind me, running out to the car and turning on the ignition. I back out and hung a right, still dressed in a suit and tie. Nat King Cole blared from the speakers, and for once, I didn't turn it off, because my hands were sweaty and my heart was racing and, okay, I could use a little Christmas cheer, since I didn't have any vodka at hand.

I pulled up to Glimmer Rambin's house, holding my breath. I looked at my clock. Twenty five minutes.

"Okay," I said to myself, quietly.

I walked up the front steps and knocked on the door.

I didn't know who I was hoping would answer-her parents, or maybe her older brother who was probably home for the holidays. But the girl I was looking for materialized in front of me. Blonde hair, blue eyes, leggings and all.

If she was surprised, she only showed it for a second. I was the one that probably looked like a deer caught in headlights.

She wordlessly widened the door, motioning for me to walk in. I did, and I opened my mouth.

But before I could say a word, she kissed me.

I jumped out of my skin. All of my hair was standing on end. Oh, god no. Not this. Not now. We hadn't indulged in our drunken hookups in over a year, and that's not what I came for-

But there was an awareness to it, and that nagged me even more. Glimmer was completely sober.

"Glimmer-"

"Stop talking."

I tried to work a few more words out of my mouth, but nothing came. She didn't let me say anything, smothering me with her hot kisses and heavy breath. When was the last time a girl had kissed me this way? I had a fling with Finch Emerson over the summer, but she wasn't brave enough to do anything like this. She definitely didn't make my heart pound this much.

The time between me walking through the door and Glimmer throwing me onto her bed couldn't have been more than sixty seconds.

God, help me.

XXX

**A/N: HOT DAMN, and this is just the start of the high drama chappies. Get excited ladies and gents ;D**

**Sorry this update was a lil' late. Hard to believe, but I do a plethora of extracurricular shit (basically meaning track and going to the mall) along with being a Junior in high school, and midterm exams got the best of me this week. I'm going HAM once midterms are over with FF, so I apologize in the meantime for any update delays.**

**144 reviews so far is amazing. I love you guys 3872483758793478394 (that much).**

**xx Nina**


	18. Chapter Eighteen: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

_"You."_

I didn't even have a minute to match the face to the words before Clove grabbed me. She had a vice grip on my arm, tugging me away from the living room and (more specifically) people.

"Jesus, killer, calm down." I dug my feet into the ground. Memories of last year were flashing back to me, specifically the ones where she hit me across the face. I wasn't feeling up to that at the moment.

She spun around, point blank glaring at me. "What the hell are you doing here?" she demanded.

"The Quaids invited me."

"Oh really?"

"Really."

"You expect me to believe Marvel would invite _you, _of all—"

"Our parents are friends. They came, so I came."

"Shouldn't you be with Glimmer Rambin right now?" Clove said, fuming.

"Why would I be with her?"

"It's a Saturday night and she's your _girlfriend,_ so sorry if I'm going out on a limb here."

I rolled my eyes. I'd braced myself for the sarcasm, so this wasn't anything out of the ordinary. "What d'you want, Clove?"

"Where's Marvel?"

"I wouldn't know. He hates me, remember?"

"I haven't seen him this entire fucking night, and it's his house—"

"Calm down, he's probably just talking up some of his parents' friends—"

She grabbed onto my collar. "If you tell me to calm down _one _more time Ludwig, I swear to God—"

"What d'you want to see him so bad for, anyway?" I pushed her away from me as gently as I could. My fingers brushed against hers, and I tried to ignore the fact that my heart was racing. "You guys are best friends, you spend enough time together as it is."

"It's complicated," she responded.

I cocked my head. "Are you guys fighting?" I asked, a little too innocently.

"No," she said. She looked away, the frustration in her voice palpable. "Well, yeah, but there's more to it than that. I—"

And then she narrowed her eyes, right at me.

If looks could kill.

"Stop."

"Huh?"

"Stop playing me for a fool. It's not a coincidence that you're here and Marvel isn't. What are you up to?"

I glanced at my watch. Marvel needed another twenty minutes.

_ Fucking hell._

"I'm not up to anything."

"Don't lie to me, Cato. Where is he?"

"I already told you, I don't know."

She seethed. Her eyes flitted to the door, and she took one last look at me, just before storming out.

Marvel's words from earlier rung in my head.

_Make sure she doesn't leave. She'll figure out soon enough what I'm up to, and the entire thing will fall apart._

The last thing I needed was for her to turn up on Glimmer's doorstep.

"Wait."

I reached out and grabbed her hand. She looked at it, looked up to me, and tried to shake out of my grasp. I clung on.

"Let go of me, Cato."

"You can't leave."

"Sure I can."

"No, you—you can't. Stay." I stumbled over my words.

"Cato, I need a straight answer—"

"I want you to stay. You look beautiful." I spat out the first thing that popped into my head. _Distract her, Cato, you have to. _I looked at my watch. Eighteen minutes. "That dress really suits you."

"Oh, _please."_ Her voice rose, and she shook me away. "Stop it! Stop trying to distract me, I know you're up to something!"

"Clove," I said, "Nothing's going on."

"Damnit, Cato, if you don't tell me _right now _what you're playing at, then I'm going to run right out of here, and we both know that there's nothing you'd be able to do about that."

Shit.

I looked at her shoes. Even in patent black flats, I'd bet she'd be able to outrun me.

Well. Fuck it, then.

"Alright, fine. You're right." I let go of her. "I'm planning something with Marvel. And I'm sorry, but I can't tell you."

"What—"

"Look," I cut her off, "I can't explain—"

"Oh, you _better, _I deserve an explanation—"

"You do, but I can't give it to you right now." My patience was starting to wear.

Seventeen minutes.

"Trust me, you wouldn't like what I'd tell you. It's for your own good that you don't know, because you'd try to get in the way of it, which would mess everything up—"

"Maybe because whatever plan you've hatched with Quaid is a stupid one!"

I saw the gears turning in her head. I had to think, and fast. She was seconds away from figuring it all out.

"Alright, you want to know the plan? Well if it works, then things will finally be the way they're supposed to be."

It took her no time to figure out what that meant. It meant me and her. Together.

She laughed darkly. "Now I know you're lying." She turned on her heel.

"Why would I lie about that?"

"Last year was last year, if you gave a damn about any of that you would've broken up with Glimmer the _second _you found out about Marvel's internship—"

"What are you talking about?" I demanded.

"Isn't it obvious?" She threw her hands up. "You said the only reason you'd date her was to keep her away from Marvel, and to keep him safe. Well, guess what? You don't need to worry about that anymore, and you haven't had to worry about that since the thirtieth, because he'll be three hundred miles away from Glimmer in two weeks!"

I froze.

"Oh, god. I honestly never realized that."

"Bullshit."

"No, I'm serious—"

"Cato," she fumed. "I'm leaving. Right now. Unless you give me an answer."

"I can't, Clove. You're going to have to trust me on this one."

"I don't know what the fuck's going on, but if there's one thing I do know, it's that you're goddamn liar."

"I'm doing it for a good reason." My temper rose. I could feel the calmer part of me, the part of me that I'd worked so hard to find, start to falter. And when I spoke, my voice came out half angry, half begging. "Just trust me, okay? I don't get why that's so hard—"

"Because you haven't told me the truth!"

That was it. That was the crack in my resolve.

"You want to know the truth?" I snapped. "Alright, fine. I never stopped loving you."

XXX

**A/N: . . . dun dun dunnn!**

**We're going to return to the Marvel/Glim Glim drama next chapter, so yayayayayay get excited! Let's see how Quaid fares in Glimmer's bed, eh?**

**I really hope you guys enjoyed this!**

**This video might be of some interest to, gee, one of you-** ** www . youtube watch?v=wXFCPUlGYEM**

**Haters gonna hate, players gonna play. I love all of you at the end of the day.**

**Lolrhymes.**

**xx Nina**

**PS. Thank you so much for all of the continued love and support, I really appreciate all of the feedback.**


	19. AN (aka I suck)

Hi guys! I'm writing this in between my Art History/US history studies, so sorry if I'm a little scattered. I've literally become a slave to the books the last couple of days, honestly I haven't even had time to do a legitimate run since Sunday (for a track nut that's about 2873842843 years), so it's safe to say that _Shake it Out _has remained untouched. It looks like the next chapter will be posted either sometime this weekend, if not the middle of next week, and I'm really sorry. Just thought I'd let you guys know, since I personally hate it when authors leave us with a fanfiction drought and don't give much of an explanation. Again, I'm sososososososo incredibly sorry : ( Thank you all so much to your incredibly kind reception to the last chapter though, I really appreciate it and definitely hope that you'll all be just as satisfied with the next one. Lots of love and hugs from little miss sleep-deprived over here.

xx Nina


	20. Chapter Twenty: Glimmer

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Glimmer~

"Glimmer—"

"Stop." I shut him up, crushing my lips against his and throwing him onto the bed, riding him. I cupped his face with my hands. And he lay there, frozen.

That is, until I grabbed at his crotch.

"Jesus, Christ!" He jumped, bolting up and pushing me off of him.

"What the hell?"

He scrambled to his feet, fixing his belt buckle as I stared at him. His face was flushed and his hands were shaking. The bulge in his pants was beyond obvious.

Well, the fucking _hell._

"Glimmer, listen—"

"You've only wanted to fuck me for two years," I snapped.

"I know—"

"So what's your problem?"

Some words kept trying to force their way out of his mouth, but instead he kept making a guttural sound.

"Marvel," I snapped.

"I didn't come here for that," he said, motioning to the bed. To me. He took a step forward, gingerly pulling up my shirt. I hadn't even realized it'd slipped down to expose my left boob. Might've been why he'd had such a hard time looking at me.

I can only describe the next thing I felt as embarrassment.

"Oh," I said, simply.

He took a seat at the foot of my bed, and I made some space for him. _I didn't come here for that. _Well, that was a first.

"What d'you want, then?" I asked.

"Just to talk to you. A lot's gone down in the last week."

I turned to him.

Oh, god.

"I know about Finnick's," he started. "I know that you wanted to hookup with me there. And judging by what just happened—"

"No, that's true," I said. "I thought it was what you'd wanted."

"Glimmer, of course I want to—"

I laughed.

"—but we really shouldn't." I looked up to him. No sympathy, no sugar-coating. It was the truth. And for some reason, it was more comforting than anything else he could've said to me. You're with Cato, I'm leaving in two weeks, I want to treat you well. Etcetera.

He looked me in the eye. "Listen, I think you're beautiful and I love your confidence. But I don't think that what I feel for you is real."

And there it was.

Well, he was getting right to the heart of the matter. I might as well do the same. "I know." I swallowed. "I just don't get why you wouldn't go for it. Y'know, most guys would."

It took him a minute to work out what I was saying. "I'm not like that. I can't sleep with you and know that it's all wrong."

"What, so you don't let your dick make your decisions?"

And, suddenly, we were laughing. Both of us. It was sad and it was harsh, but it was true. He clasped on to my hand, and I let him. I looked at the ground.

"Do you think that's why Cato's with me?" I asked.

He didn't say anything.

"Hmm. So it is."

"No, Glimmer—it's more complicated than that." He opened his mouth to say something, but then shut it.

"Go on," I told him.

"Look, what I know and what I'd tell you—"

"Let me guess," I said. "It has something to do with Clove." He looked at me, stunned, but I continued. "I'm some kind of holdover for him until he's with her. Which I don't get, because I talked to her last week and it's obvious that she's into him." I raised a brow. "Am I wrong?"

"No, you've got the idea right—"

"Then tell me the truth." He hesitated. "C'mon, Marvel. Ignorance isn't bliss for me anymore, I'm over it."

He eyed me. He waited a second before talking.

"When were you planning on ending things with Cato?"

I shrugged. "I dunno. I was going to sleep with you and then figure it out." I ran a hand through my hair. "But I'll end it. I'm not going to ignore the truth, it's not even worth it at this point."

"Well," he said, "I could tell you the truth."

"Please."

"But before I do, I need to make sure of one thing."

I raised a brow.

"You're not going to like it. Cato had good intentions for everyone . . . except you." He shifted on my bed. My heart hammered out of my chest. "That was last year, things are probably different between you and him now. And what I'd tell you would permanently ruin any relationship you two have."

"Are you saying you don't think I can handle the truth, Marvel?" I shot.

"I think you can handle it just fine. But I don't think you need to know it." He threw his hands up in defense. "You already know the gist of it, if you really want to know the entire thing then fine, but trust me—"

"You know what, you're right."

He froze. "What?"

I thought of all the possibilities, all of the reasons why Cato would date me for a year when he felt nothing. Did he think of Clove, every time we were together? Did he do it to make him a better man, to prove to her that he could treat someone well? That he could be faithful? Or maybe he did it because he was angry, and I was the most convenient, most attractive girl he could get his hands on. And especially since I was the one Marvel wanted, and being with me was a slap in the face to him too—God, I'd be boiling mad if I was Clove.

_Cato had good intentions for everyone except you._

I didn't know what that meant, but if there was one thing I did know, it's that Marvel was right. Things between me and Cato had changed. And for the better. Dating someone for a year does that to you. We were more relaxed, more patient, less demanding. He hadn't gotten what he wanted—that was always Clove. And maybe I did get everything I wanted. But it wasn't what I needed.

I knew what I needed now. And it wasn't this.

"I don't want to know," I said. "I know enough as it is."

He exhaled. "Good."

I turned to him. I took his hand, and ran my thumb across his knuckles. "I'm really sorry, Marvel."

"Bout what?"

"You always seem to get the short end of the stick."

_Yeah. No girl, no sex, and two friends shorter than he was at the end of last year._

He shook his head. "Nahh, I'll be alright. Washington will be good for me. I'll be away from Madison and all of this." He looked me in the eye. "And I think six months is more than enough time for me to get over you."

Again, laughter.

He leaned in, pressing his lips against mine. We both knew it'd be for the last time.

I pulled away. "When you get back, though—"

"Oh we're going to be friends for a long time. You can count on that."

Maybe it was something about the way the light was hitting him, or the fact that my pulse had stopped racing. But this was _exactly _the way I'd wanted to see Marvel Quaid, and the way I wanted him to see me. No attachments. No obligations. Friends.

I had no hookup buddy that was in love with me. I had no boyfriend.

I was free.

"So what about Cato and Clove?" I asked him.

"Well, what d'you think?"

I didn't hesitate. "I don't think he'll stop at anything to be with her. It's only a matter of time."

"Eh, I guess. I don't necessarily agree."

"Why not?"

"Because he loves her." He turned away from me, and I could tell. This was the one thing he was afraid of. "You better believe that he'll try first. Y'know, try to give her a reason to take a chance. But if she wants him to . . . he'll let her go.

XXX

**A/N: Muhahahaha :D Cato/Clove interaction next chapter! Get excited y'all.**

**Thanks so much for bearing with me this past week, I just have precalc tomorrow and I'm home free.**

**Vote on my profile page for the next fic you want to see from me, since I'm wrapping up Shake it Out.**

**Thanks so much for all of the continued love and support, let me know you think this'll end in the reviews :D**

**xx Nina**


	21. Chapter Twenty-One: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

"You want to know the truth? Alright, fine. I never stopped loving you."

Oh.

Well. Goddamnit.

I'd _had _a snarky comeback armed and ready for him, but now nothing was coming out. I stared, my mouth gaping, speechless. And his expression was also fucked up. He hadn't planned on saying that, I could tell. He probably wanted to take it back. I mean, if I were him, I would. But now it was out there, and we both knew. This couldn't be undone.

"But you already knew that, didn't you?" he said. He laughed. And there was nothing funny about it.

"I didn't until now," I managed.

"Bullshit."

"Glimmer told me you felt that way last week," I snapped, "I didn't have any reason to think it was true, considering—"

"Considering _what?"_

"The past year!" I groaned. "Everything that happened was such a long time ago! And we're fucking teenagers, I don't even know if anything was even real _then—"_

"_Please,"_ he said, "Don't give me that."

"What—"

"Stop trying to make yourself believe you didn't feel the same way," he said. He glanced me over. "Or that you still don't."

I didn't say anything for a minute. And my mind unintentionally jumped to that Vampire Diaries episode.

_No one will ever sit around a table and tell stories about a man who couldn't love._

I'd watched enough movies and television shows in my lifetime. I knew what this was. This was my defining moment.

I forced myself to look him in the eye. My heart dropped.

I wasn't ready for it.

He waited for me to say something, but after a minute I kept fumbling around for something _(anything_) to come out of my mouth. Nothing.

"So I'm the dirty little liar, huh?" he said. He took a step closer to me. "You're the one that's lying to yourself."

"Stop it."

"You wanted honesty, Clove." He threw his hands up. "Here it is."

I thought of the millions of different ways this could end. And I did, I tried to remember how we got to this point in the first place.

Marvel Quaid was missing from his own party. I was threatening to leave.

_ If you don't tell me right now what you're playing at, then I'm going to run right out of here, and we both know that there's nothing you'd be able to do about that._

Instinctively, I turned for the door.

_ If everything works out tonight, then things will finally be the way they're supposed to be._

Clearly, Cato's confession was something to distract me. Because for some reason he wanted to keep me at the Quaid's. It had something to do with a plan of his and Marvel's.

Well, he was right about one thing. He couldn't outrun me.

"Clove!" he called out.

He grabbed my arm as I tried making my way through the door. I snapped back to him.

I was so damn sick of seeing that face.

"I'm leaving, and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm done playing your little games. If your goal tonight was for you and me to get together, then I'm sorry, you failed."

His eyes widened as I said that. The second he let go of my hand, I sprinted away.

I wanted to what I'd just seen—the look on his face—from my memory.

Based on what Cato told me and my best friend's romantic history, I could guess Marvel was at Glimmer's. Except I wasn't making the run to Addison. I ran all of fifty yards before stopping, going up the flight of stairs to my bedroom and stripping down. I grabbed the first sports bra I could find and a pair of shorts. It was freezing outside, but I didn't care. And just before I left the house, I laced up my Sauconys. I gave myself a second to wiggle my toes and arch my foot.

And, like that, I bolted from the house.

I was doing the best thing I knew how to do. I was putting one foot in front of the other, running for no destination other than my mental sanity.

XXX

**A/N: Clove. You suck.**

**Tease for tomorrow? She just keeeeps running running **_**and running running **__**and running running **__**AND RUNNING RUNNING**_

**(#early2000's throwback :D)**

**Thank you guys sososososo much for your incredibly kind feedback! Leave a review and I'll love you forever.**

**xx Nina**


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

_So I put my faith, in something unknown-_

_ I'm living on such sweet nothing._

_ But I'm tired of hope, with nothing to hold—_

_ Sweet nothing_

_ Sweet nothing_

_ Budududua budududa—_

"Jesus Christ," I groaned. My breath cut through the December air; it looked like tendrils of smoke were coming out of my mouth. Of _all _Florence and the Machine songs I could have stuck in my head right now, "Sweet Nothing" just _had _to be the one that was taunting me. Funny, because it seemed to have lyrical significance to my life. I hated it.

My only source of light were the lamps dotting the streets, and in between the darkness and the snow that was falling to the ground, I felt like I was running into an abyss. Well, fine by me, if it meant getting away from Madison.

_Sweet nothing, sweet nothing, you're giving me such sweet nothing—_

Fuck you, Calvin Harris.

Pop culture seemed to be mocking me. Florence and the Machine was mocking me, Vampire Diaries was mocking me—at this rate, it was only a matter of time before Taylor Swift slapped me in the face. And all for what, huh? For some boy?

And, like that, I felt the blood that was already rushing to my face start to boil.

There was complicated, and then there was frustrating. I didn't know what I felt at this point. "I never stopped loving you"—what the hell did that mean?

I flashed back to last weekend.

_I can only watch my boyfriend gawk at you so many times before deciding that I can't fucking take it anymore._

Was that it, then?

Who was I fooling—of course it was.

Cato's confession wasn't a distraction, or part of any plan. It was the truth. And we both knew it.

… Which was _exactly _why I was running.

"So that's it, then?" I breathed. And, like that, I stopped. I stopped to look at where I was. Madison Reservation—exactly three miles from my house. And I hadn't even broken a sweat.

I looked into the woods. There was a trail I'd run there every so often, when I _really _felt like busting my ass, because it went gradually uphill for close to a mile before reaching a sharp incline to the top.

_No one will ever sit around a table and tell stories about a man that couldn't love._

Well. So long as a blonde vampire was taunting me, I'd fucking _walk _up that hill.

There's something to be said about running. You can't think straight. Really, you don't even think about _everything._ It's all noise. You just do what you're doing, trying to stay in motion and having your thoughts jump from thing to another.

Maybe that's why I did it so much.

"You're not addicted to drugs," Marvel had told me once. "You're addicted to endorphins."

Yeah, well. Endorphins make it easier to distract yourself from your problems—

I almost stopped in my tracks.

Well, damn.

It took me long enough to admit that to myself.

At first, I fell into a sprint. I pushed myself up that hill, and I knew it was a desperate attempt to get back to endorphin-land. To get back to musing about Florence and the Machine and Vampire Diaries and the fact that I was running. Anything _but _Cato Ludwig. But I stopped almost as soon as I started sprinting, and found myself flat on my back and looking up at the heavens.

Maybe it was something in the air. Maybe it was twenty degree weather, the fact that I was only wearing a sports bra, or a general result of how long this had dragged on for. But I was tired of running—literally and otherwise.

"Okay," I whispered. I took a deep breath.

Fact: Cato loves me.

Fact: He was honest with me tonight.

Fact: Whatever he'd planned with Marvel was for my own good.

Fact: He's better than I give him credit to be.

My heart raced.

"Fact," I mumbled, so quietly that only I could hear myself, "I'm scared."

I let those words sit on my tongue for a minute. I let them sink in.

I knew what I'd have to admit it to myself. And I'd have to do it sooner than later. Because the longer I waited, the harder it'd be.

My feelings for him where clinging on to me. I needed to shake that devil off my back.

XXX

**A/N: This chapter's delay has been brought to you by season depression, whoaaaaa!**

**-In all seriousness, I was in a slump recently and just needed some to focus on myself and log some miles. Lame, I know, but I'm hoping to make it up to you guys with mega-update-February (wheeee!)**

**Hope y'all enjoyed. This chapter was probably influenced by the xx's infinity, it's been stuck in my head all week so that'd be why :D**

**Thank you guys so much for the reviews. I love you all, and let's bring that pretty number up to over 200, eh?**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for next time—Glimmer and Cato hash things out.**

...


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

"Are you busy?"

I had to blink twice, because the image in front of me wasn't registering. Glimmer Rambin was on my doorstep, and she was my day-before-Christmas-morning surprise.

"Um, no," I said, swinging it open, motioning for her to come in. _Pick your jaw off the floor, Cato, you're being rude. _"Sorry, I'm tactless. Do you want something to drink?"

"Thanks, but no. I won't be long." She shrugged off her coat.

I nodded, going to the kitchen myself while she situated herself in my living room. I toyed with the idea of slipping vodka into my water glass instead of water, because I'd just woken up and it was too damn _early _for this bullshit—

I looked at the clock. 12:45.

Ooookay, Cato. Best to put señor vodka away.

I was still wiping the crud on my eyes as I walked back to Glimmer. She looked like Glimmer, alright. Except less flashy and more . . . comfortable? Assertive? Her clothing was throwing me off, in between the skintight sweater and the riding boots.

"So," I said, clearing my throat and sitting next to her. "Did you have a good weekend?"

"Cato, I need to tell you something."

I raised a brow. Could I guess where this was going? Nah, my brain wasn't cooperating.

"Okay—"

"Marvel came to see me on Saturday. We talked for a while, and I realized—"

"I already know," I cut in. "He told me. He told me you two talked, I mean."

She didn't bother hiding her stunned reaction. "Oh. Okay then." She paused before saying, "Did you two plan this, or—"

"Kind of," I said. "He was cryptic about it, he just said he wanted to talk to you and asked me to cover for him at his parents' party."

"Did he tell you what we talked about?"

I shrugged. "Not really. But I got the implication."

She nodded. I didn't say anything, so she took that as a cue to go on.

"Well, I've been thinking about it a lot the last couple of days." She sighed. We never had conversations like this. At least not when we were sober. "I'm done with this bullshit. It's not worth it anymore."

I nodded. She turned and looked me in the eye.

"I need to know the truth."

"Okay," I answered.

"Are you still in love with Clove?"

Her words hung in the air. Well, hurrah for Glimmer for pulling one over me—a girl that popular knew all of the secrets of evasion and manipulation to get the information she wanted. And she was getting right to the point.

"I think you can answer that yourself," I said.

She nodded. She didn't say anything, so I took that as my cue to talk.

"My turn to ask a question." She mildly nodded. "Are you still in love with me?"

She thought for a minute. I resisted the urge to wipe the crud out of my eyes.

_You're seeing clearly, Cato. Stop telling yourself this isn't happening._

"No," she said. "I don't think so."

Point two for Glimmer.

"I'm not sure how much I ever actually felt for you," she explained. "I know I really, really liked you, but when we started dating, I was expecting the push-and-pull jerk-off Cato, and not some . . ." She motioned towards me, fumbling.

"Nice guy?" I said.

"Yeah. That. It's not that I liked you any less, it's just—"

"The appeal was gone," I finished. I nodded. "I felt the same way, after a while."

"Really?"

"Really." I looked her dead in the eye. "I always thought you were the hottest girl in school. Not that you aren't anymore, but I kind of realized that—"

"Blonde hair and big boobs wasn't what you wanted?"

"It wasn't what I _needed_," I said. "C'mon, Glimmer, let's be real here. I can't date someone that's as much of a nymphomaniac as I am."

It was funny, in its own weird, completely fucked up way. We both stifled laughter; I still couldn't get over the fact that Glimmer Rambin was sitting in my living room.

"I guess that's that," she said. "You're in love with Clove."

"And you're out of love with me."

"See? Convenient." Her tone couldn't be more wistful.

It was. Really. I'd celebrated my eighteenth birthday last month, and Glimmer would be a legal adult in May. It'd taken us so long to figure out how to stop making things complicated for ourselves.

_Things are more convenient when you're honest._

Well, so long as we were having a moment-

"Glimmer," I started. She turned to me. "If there's one thing dating you made me realize, it's that I really do like you. Maybe not in that way—"

"Yeah, I get it. That was always Clove—"

"But doing more than fucking you was good for us. For _you."_ She raised a brow, startled.

"Gee, thanks," she said, slightly offended.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, yeah. But seriously. You're a better person in ways you don't give yourself credit to be."

"Really. How so?"

I thought of the Glimmer Rambin that'd transferred to Madison our freshman year, the ex private school girl, the bottle blonde dream. If her big boobs and beautiful smile didn't draw you in, then her air of confidence did. She _knew _she was gorgeous and charming, and she used it to her advantage. She could be a good flirt and fun person to party with, and she had just about all of the stereotypical conventions of a Queen Bee. She didn't just fill that role—she _was _it.

And then I dated her.

"You're fearless now," I said. I thought of Erin and Jen, the girls she'd been a friend with for years. How she gradually distanced herself, and then dropped them altogether. They also happened to be the two most popular girls in school. "You don't care what other people think of you anymore. Do you?"

She shrugged. If she was surprised at the direction our conversation was taking, she hid it well. "I think everyone does, at least a little. But, if what you're saying is that I stopped trying to be the Homecoming Queen—you're right."

"Why?"

"Because I knew I was." She smirked. "I _am. _I know I'm charming and good looking and that I can get anyone I want, at least anyone that's worth it, and that's good enough for me."

"Is that why you're not friends with Erin and Jen anymore?" I asked. I added, "Is that why you're breaking up with me?"

"I'm not going to surround myself with people that I can't stand, at least not for the sake of popularity." She put her hand on my knee. "And I'm not breaking up with you, Cato. Technically, it's a mutual thing."

I laughed. "So now you can't stand me?"

"No. But you picked Clove Fuhrman over me." She snorted. "You've got bad taste, man."

"Yeah, yeah," I said.

We didn't say anything for a minute. As she surveyed me, I didn't have to guess what was running through her mind. I knew what she thought of me.

If I didn't like her, I wasn't worth it.

She didn't know how right she was.

I looked to the clock. Had it really only been ten minutes since she walked through my door? Well, now that most everything had been said, I guess it was our chance to get any final unpleasant truths out of the way. I hated you at first—I hated our relationship—you've scarred me—you've cost me a good friend. But there wasn't any need to. We both knew. And we both knew that whatever had happened last year was part of a distant past, and those people were very, very different than the ones sitting in my living room.

Everything was coming full circle. There was only one last thing to say.

"You better talk to me when you're in college," I said.

"You better believe I will."

"Even when you're too busy getting with frat boys and football players?"

She rolled her eyes, amused. "It's your own damn fault for not loving me, Ludwig."

I thought of Clove, and then I thought of Glimmer. I glanced over the blonde vixen in front of me, in all of her best and worst qualities.

Glimmer Rambin was a lot of things. Headstrong. Beautiful. Confident. Stubborn.

Honest.

"You're right," I said. "It is."

XXX

**A/N:** **Fun fact—before I shipped Clato, I shipped Glato. Clearly that's changed, but the part of me that fangirled over Alexander Ludwig and Leven Rambin last year probably wrote this.**

**Check out my tumblr if you're wondering what my deal with updates lately has been. I don't want to burden another chapter with an Author's note describing my suckitude, so I'll put it over there. *hangs head in shame***

**I love you all. You're the best reviewers a girl could ever ask for—thank you.**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for next time? Marvel and Cato bromance it up.**


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four: Marvel

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Marvel~

"Y'know, I think it's in poor taste to name a snowstorm after a Disney movie."

"Really?"

"Really. I'll never be able to watch Finding Nemo the same way again," I said, digging my shovel into the snow and dumping it over my shoulders.

"Yeah, well. If a clownfish is the reason we're getting paid, I'm not complaining," Cato replied. "Not that you need the cash."

"True. Remind me again why I agreed to this?"

We laughed at that, digging back into the foot of snow. I'd woken up to an eight AM call from Cato. "Meet me at the corner of Berkley and Smith, and bring your shovel. Do it or I'll cut you." I figured, eh, why not?, so at the crack of dawn, I was shoveling out my neighbors' driveways with my ex-best-friend-but-not-really.

Honestly, I was still getting used to the dynamic.

"Remember when we used to sled down at the Reservation?" Cato said.

"Yeah. Remember that one time we almost died because you didn't see a tree?" I said.

"Hahh! You were such a sissy. I don't think my eardrum's ever recovered." He heaved, digging his shovel into the snow. More shoveling. "I kind of miss those near-death experiences. You get a rush, y'know?"

"Hey, that's what drinking's for." I wiped the beads of sweat from my forehead. "Speaking of, what are you doing tonight?" I asked. "We could ring in the New Year together, now that we're friends again and all."

Offhanded, honest comments like that used to be awkward. Now they were normal. "I'm going to Times Square with Lyme and her friends. I'd invite you to come, but it was hard enough for me to get in on that."

"Hard? Your older sister would reject you?"

He looked at me dead seriously. "New Years is sacred to her. You know her friends are the golden kids of the class of 2011."

"The golden year?"

"Exactly." He pointed a finger at me. "This isn't a party, this is a pilgrimage."

I chortled, leaning down and packing a snowball, throwing it at him. "Man, you're so full of shit."

"Well, to tell you the truth, they'll all be trashed by midnight. You could probably keep a five foot radius from us up until then and then move in once they're under the influence."

"Nahh, but thanks. Annie Cresta was nice enough to throw a going away thing for all of the Washington kids, I figured I'd invite you."

"Okay, so at least you have something going on tonight. Is it going to be Peeta and his friends?"

"Yeah," I said, slowly. Cato stopped shoveling, noticing the inflection in my voice. "Well, that and Finch's friends, which basically means the entire girls Cross Country team."

Cato's reaction was exactly what I expected it be—a long, drawled out sigh. "Whelp, you have fun with that, then. Ex summer flings and all." He was referencing Finch.

Cato had given me the very, very condensed version of what'd happened at my parents' party the week before—'I slipped that I was in-fucking-love with Clove and she ran for the hills'—and he'd told me that a few days after, him and Glimmer had sorted things out. Broken up, but on friendly terms. Kind of the way Glimmer and I had decided to keep things.

Everything was coming full circle. The only thing left to fix was between Cato and Clove.

"I'm assuming she hasn't talked to you," I said.

He shook his head. "You?" he asked.

"Nahh. Not since we got into that fight two weeks ago." I put my shovel back into the snow, and Cato set his down, stretching out his arms. "I doubt she'd end our friendship over it, though, I don't even remember what we were fighting about."

"Something about Glimmer and me, right?"

I snorted. "Doesn't matter. It's just fucking ironic at this point. The three of us—and this problem is allegedly all of _our_ faults—are the ones that have our shit together. It's just her that needs to sort things out."

"Yeah, you're right."

His breath was curling into the air, like tendrils. It was easily after five in the afternoon, and the sun was just starting to dip over the horizon. We'd been at it all day.

"Do you think we've lost her for good?" I asked. I didn't bother hiding the worry in my voice.

"We? Well, no, not you" Cato said, earnestly. "She cares about you way too much, not that she'd ever admit it."

"And what about you?" I asked.

"I don't know," he said, plainly.

I knew Cato Ludwig and I were on track to be best friends again because I felt a pang of sympathy for him.

"But I think she'll come around," he said. "Maybe I just caught her off-guard, y'know? She could just need some time to sleep on it."

We both knew the truth—that idea was hopeful at best. Getting emotion out of Clove was next to impossible, I knew that from years of being around her and her family. Her parents were always too busy with work; she wasn't raised in the most sympathetic environment. And the odds of someone with a past as rocky Cato's changing her? Doubtful.

But, then again. We lived in a world where the star football player and captain of the cheerleading squad weren't together. Cato was putting faith into something that could go either way. Everything was on the line, and he could get hurt.

But that didn't need to be said.

_I think she'll come around._

I turned to him, nodding. "Yeah. Maybe."

XXX

**A/N: Gotta love Cato and Marvel.**

**Sorry for the filler-y nature of this chapter, things pick up real soon so I figured some character development was in order.**

**Thank you guys so, so much for all of the reviews. If any of you would want to check out my one-shot Infinity I'd really appreciate it, the pairing's a little weird but I'm proud of it nonetheless. It could use some love xx**

**Tease for tomorrow? Malibu Barbie! (but actually :P)**

**Nina**


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

XXX

"Goddammit!"

_That's it_, I thought, throwing the pencil against the wall. I frowned at my reflection in the mirror, the black smudge under the rim of my eye taunting me. _Hahhh!_ it went. _Someone doesn't know how to be a girl!_

I groaned, turning on the water and washing my face, scrubbing at my eyes until every trace of the liner was gone. I didn't know shit about makeup. I didn't give a shit about how I _looked,_ and the only thing I ever wore was a swipe of mascara and some cover-up. It was simple. It was easy. They were easy enough to _use_.

So the one night of the year I tried to get dolled up, I looked up a youtube video because I didn't exactly know where to begin. I settled for some British girl that showed you how to do a brown eye look inspired by some Victoria's Secret model. Honestly, it was the best thing I could find, and I was actually doing okay until I just about poked my eye out. Now I was just feeling incompetent.

So I started over. I went through the motions, covering up the ever-present bags under my eyes (I could thank six AP classes for that) and concealing any blemishes. I brushed back my eyebrows, and tried to figure out what to do from there. No way in hell was I going to bother with that eyeliner shit again.

_What are you doing?_

There was a voice in the bag of my head that kept nagging at me, and it made it hard for me to keep my hands steady.

_I'm trying to make myself look pretty for once. And I'm going to do it right._

_You don't need the makeup—Cato would like you either way_.

I was trying this new thing where I didn't deny myself the truth.

Okay, fine. So I was trying to look good for Cato. It was kind of hard to ignore the way my stomach was doing backflips. That and, unlike most members of the female species, I didn't spend my adolescence concerned with my appearance. I didn't even know if I was pretty, really. The only thing I could say for myself was that I liked my legs, which didn't have anything to do with my face.

Fact: I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.

"Helloooooo?"

I jolted, hearing Johanna Mason's voice ring through my house. I got sparkly brown eye-shadow on my nose.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed.

"Yep, she's here." That was Katniss.

"Clover? Clovercita?" I heard Finch Emerson call out.

"Go away, I'm busy," I shouted.

I heard a brigade of footsteps go up my stairs. I turned, and the entire girls Varsity Cross Country team was standing outside my bedroom. Johanna, Katniss, Finch, Jackie, Rue and Grete.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked. The surprise on my face must've been funny, because everyone started laughing at me. I couldn't even bring myself to be pissed off.

"Are you putting on makeup?" Finch teased, rummaging through the products I had splayed on my counter.

"I'm trying," I groaned. "Don't you have a party to be at? It was basically thrown for you."

"Well, you weren't there, so we figured we'd see what the fuck that was all about," Jackie said.

"Yeah, we couldn't party without you," Rue chirped.

"Because we all know Clove is such a party girl." That offhanded sarcasm came from Grete, and it was enough to make me crack a smile.

"Seriously, why didn't you go?" Finch asked.

I sighed. I didn't respond right away. All it took was a glance to my makeup, and Johanna had it all figured out.

"Oh my god—holy shit!" she shouted.

"What?" Katniss demanded, turning to her. I felt my ears go pink.

"You're seeing Cato tonight, aren't you?" Johanna yelled. The excitement in her voice was infectious, because soon, everyone else was shouting amongst themselves.

"No—"

"Wait, really!?"

"Clover's getting a boyfriend-!"

"Calm the fuck down," I snapped. Finch and Johanna were bouncing where they stood.

"Well, are you?" Rue asked.

I glanced back to them, looking at their faces. All six of them. Six girls who, over the last four years and close to eleven seasons, I'd slogged through hundreds of miles with.

I sighed. Oh, fuck it.

"Yeah—"

Squealing ensued.

"—but not if I look like this!"

Katniss snorted. "Since when do you care what you look like?"

"I don't!" I exclaimed. "Well, I mean, I didn't. But I want to put in a little effort for tonight, and I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. That and—in case it wasn't already obvious—I'm freaking the fuck out!" I said. I choked back some pride, spitting out the words before I could think too much of them. "Are any of you good with this stuff?" I asked, holding up the makeup brush.

"Here, gimme," Jackie said, already swiping an eyeshadow palette from the countertop.

"I'll work on her hair." Finch lunged forward, already grabbing pieces of it and framing my face.

Rue brightened. "Ooh, I can help with her outfit—"

"Rue, my mom's a fashion designer!" Grete said.

"So?"

"So I think I should be in charge of that!"

She cocked a brow. "You wear dresses to school on a daily basis."

"And?"

"Clove wears track shirts and the occasional striped sweater. That's a bit of a style disconnect, don't you think?"

Bickering. Constant, sarcastic bickering. My floor was a chorus of seven teenage girls, all of our conversations and joking and musings overlapping. Jackie—the artist of us all—smoked out my eyes with a steady hand, while Finch wrapped pieces of my hair around a curling iron. I could hear Rue and Grete arguing from my bedroom—"Lace is the ultimate sign of femininity!" "But black is slimming!"—and Johanna and Katniss mulled around, overseeing the entire thing, snapping only half jokingly when someone did something wrong. "Clove's trying to seduce her man—this is serious bullshit, people!"

"So, Clover, what's your plan?" Jackie asked, coating my lashes in mascara.

"He's in the city with his sister tonight." I didn't know why I had such a big lump in my throat.

"He's in Time's Square?"

I nodded.

"How d'you plan on getting through that mob?"

"Sprinting," I deadpanned. "I mean, I have until midnight to track him down. If I'm there by ten that should be enough time."

She nodded. "Does he know you're meeting him there?"

I shook my head. "Nahhh."

"But that'd make finding him so much easier!"

I shrugged. "Yeah, well. I guess I'm just trying to be spontaneous."

"More like romantic," Finch teased.

I blushed, rolling my eyes. I was an only child. My parents weren't ever around. I didn't know what it was like to have sisters, but I couldn't imagine it being much different than this.

I hated their suffocation. And at the same time, I loved them for it.

XXX

**A/N: This chapter has been brought to you by girly!Nina. Because I had to poke some fun at Clove's makeup-ing skills :D**

**The British beauty guru I was referencing was Tanya Burr. Because that girl is **_**brilliant.**_

**LOL 4 reviews for the last chapter. The first fic I've ever posted on this site has been my most popular (273 reviews) and I'm determined to have **_**Shake it Out **_**beat that. Y'know, just so I feel like I've accomplished something better than what I could when I was in eighth grade :D Aaaaanywho, for every review I get from now through Sunday, I'll review you back. Because I'm willing to give a little to get a little, and I've been on a review-kick the last couple of days anyway. **

**Here's a cyber!cookie just for reading, mi amours.**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for next time? Times Square!**


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

_I feel so close to you right now, it's a force field_

_I wear my heart upon my sleeve—_

_There's no stopping us—_

_Dubstebdubstepdubstepdubstep _

This was why I was nursing from my beer bottle the entire night. I didn't want to end up like my sister and her friends, drunk as hell and belting Calvin Harris songs. Everyone within a fifty-yard radius of us was staring, probably wondering who the fuck was being so loud and obnoxious.

I wasn't shooting drugs with Gloss and Brutus or having coked up sex with Glimmer, like I did for a big portion of last year. I was having a couple of beers with the people I'd looked up to for most of middle and high school—my sister's friends.

It was easily the most fun I'd had in a while.

"Little bro!" Lyme pulled me into a hug, whisking me off to the side just before midnight. "D'you remember that conversation we had the day I came back?"

"Yeah. How many vodkas have you had?"

"Pfft!" She said, waving a hand and cackling. "You're such a mom! Only a couple."

"Well, I'm surprised you remember anything right now."

She rolled her eyes. "Ha, ha," she said. "This is serious, man. Who's the girl you were talking about?"

Oh God. Here we go.

"I didn't say anything about a girl."

"You're such a liar."

"You're probably thinking of Glimmer," I said, taking a swig from my beer bottle. "And we broke up, so—"

"Cato, I distinctly remember you telling me there was a game changer, and that I'd find out who she was soon enough." She threw her arm around me. "Bro, start _talking._"

Goddamnit. My sister was as Type A as they came. She wouldn't drop this even if I force fed her an entire bottle of vodka.

"Okay," I said. "Fine. It's someone you know, and she's in my grade. If you guess who she is, then I'll tell you."

When Lyme laughs too hard, she starts snorting. "This is so junior high. But you're on, pal."

As she started listing off the girls in my grade, I wondered what Clove was doing tonight. The only times I'd seen her since Marvel's Christmas party were when she on the roads running, and I'd been driving by.

"Enobaria Golding?" "No." "Jen Davis?" "No." "Katniss Everdeen." That one got me laughing. "She's been with Peeta Mellark for two years, no."

I looked at my watch. Five minutes until midnight.

2014 was a year I'd had in the back of my mind since middle school. The year I'd leave home, the year I'd go to college, the year I'd leave Madison—

I'm a star linebacker and a grade A stud. Of course I'm going to miss High School. I just never knew it'd be because I had so much unfinished business.

"Johanna Mason?" "No." "Cashmere Schlund?" "No, Gloss would kill me." "Erin Augustine?" "No."

And then, Lyme cracked a smile. She cocked her head and looked behind me, pointing. "Clove Fuhrman?"

I stopped. I eyed her, turning around, not exactly understanding why—

Oh. That explained it.

Clove was standing all of ten yards away from me.

XXX

**A/N: CLIFFIES HELL YEAH :D**

**I love writing Lyme as a suppressed college kid waaaaay too much.**

**Special announcement, whoaaaaa!—I'm writing a spin-off of **_**Shake It Out! **_**It's inspired by Ed Sheeran's **_**Kiss Me **_**and it follows Peeta's and Katniss' story. I'll have the first chapter up and running this Saturday, so if you guys would check that out I'd appreciate it sososososo much.**

**Jen won the Oscar, FUCK YEAH.**

**Thanks a ton for all of the reviews, guys. Those of you I haven't reviewed back yet, I'm getting around to it I promise, I'm back from vacation as of today so the workload's been intense.**

**Love y'all.**

**xx Nina**

**Tease for next time? Clove's perspective!**


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven: Clove

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Clove~

XXX

_December 31st, 2013—10:05 PM_

I had my iPod cranked up to blast on the train. Normally, taking the train into the city was enjoyable. But this time I couldn't stop tapping my foot, and I couldn't play any love-centric songs without throwing up, so I was reduced to listening to drinking songs.

_Shot shots shots shots shots, shot shots shots—_

_Everybody._

God. This was what Cato Ludwig had reduced me to.

_10:20 PM_

I reached the edge of Times Square. Every couple of steps I bumped into someone, and there were easily a couple thousand people just in between me and the Starbucks across the street.

Well, fuck.

"Time to go find that needle," I muttered under my breath.

_10:55 PM_

"Yeah, Marvel?"

"Have you found him yet?"

I groaned. The girls couldn't keep their mouths shut for shit. "Who told you?" I demanded.

He laughed. "All of them. To tell you the truth, I was kinda pissed you weren't around, but then Johanna explained it to me."

"Are you still pissed?"

"Nahh. We're all rooting for you over here."

From the background, I heard snippets of everyone in the room—

"Get some, girl!"

"You've got this."

"Clover's stealing back her man—"

"Did Johanna tell everyone?" I whined.

"Nope. That was mostly Finch and Jackie."

"I'm going to throttle you when I get home."

"Yeah, yeah. Go find your Prince Charming."

I hung up. My face was a probably a furious shade of red.

_11:15 PM_

Seeing other kids from Madison wasn't weird, especially not in Times Square. I bumped into Gale Hawthorne and Madge Undersee, who'd both graduated last year.

"How's Katniss been?" she asked me.

"She's alright. She's celebrating with Peeta right now, him and the other interns leave for Washington the day after tomorrow."

"Tell her we both say hi, okay?" he asked.

I nodded. I continued craning my neck through the thicket of people, and turned back to them. "Hey, you guys haven't seen Cato or Lyme Ludwig, have you?"

Gale shook his head. "No. Why, you trying to—"

Madge kicked him. "We'll let you know if we see him," she said.

I nodded_. Damnit._ "Thanks."

_11:45 PM_

Fifteen minutes before midnight, I reached a point where I gave the fuck up and started calling out his name.

"Cato? Cato?" I sounded ridiculous, but whatever.

That was when it hit me—what do I do if I don't find him? He'd probably clear out after midnight, and this entire night would've been all for nothing.

Or, the better question—what if I _do_ find him?

I felt my chest seize. I was acting blindly and impulsively, and I'd done a pretty fucking good job of distracting myself from what I'd say all afternoon.

When he'd tried to get with me last week, he'd had a plan, and it'd failed. All I was planning for was that I'd wing it and not chicken out.

_No. You're Clove Furhman. You're a star athlete and grade A overachiever. You're not scared of a teenage boy._

So I forged ahead.

"Cato?" I called out.

"Looking for someone?"

I spun around. Fucking hell.

It was Glimmer Rambin, with a beer bottle in hand, hanging with a group of guys. I recognized most of them—Thresh Okeniyi and his group of guys all did track in the spring—and it seemed a little weird, until I saw she was also with Brutus and company.

Okay. Glimmer with a harem of guys. Not so atypical.

I stood my ground. "Yeah. I'm looking for Cato, have you seen him?"

She eyed me for a second. I saw a small smile play on her lips, and she motioned with her drink. "I saw him go over that way, like, ten minutes ago. He's probably in front of the American Eagle."

I stared at her, part stunned and relieved.

"You better get a move on if you want that big kiss," she continued. "It's almost midnight. "

"Right." I cleared my throat. I searched Glimmer's expression for any sign of foul play, but I was met with a smile and bright eyes. The thought crossed my mind—was she lying? Was she pointing me the wrong way? _No_, I thought. _If she didn't want me to find him, Glimmer would've told me to go fuck myself._ _She's a bitch, but 'fake' isn't really her style._

Maybe she was remembering the time I babied her after Finnick's. Maybe she felt like she owed me something, or maybe she just wanted the four of us to finally tie up all of the loose ends.

Whatever the reason, Glimmer Rambin was helping me.

"Thanks," I said.

She nodded. "You're welcome."

I turned on my heel, walking through the crowd. That was bizarre. So, so fucking bizzare. Even if she owed me, why would Glimmer—

_You can think about that later. Focus on Cato. _

I rounded a corner. I tapped into my racing mentality, my single-track minded focus.

I stopped in front of American Eagle. I looked down at my watch. 11:55.

Well, I thought. This is it. I either found him or I didn't.

I craned my neck, and looked through the thicket of people.

And, then, my eyes landed on him

XXX

**A/N: Heheheheh. Because I'm dragging this out just for **_**one **_**more chapter ;D**

**Sorry to go back in time before getting to the present moment, but I couldn't resist. Plus I had to fully flesh out/wrap up Glimmer and Clove's relationship, so there it is.**

**Don't worry, I won't cut to Marvel's POV at random after this or something like that. The next chapter is the interaction between Cato and Clove, so get excited mes amis.**

**Thanks a million for all of the reviews. 20 more and this is my most popular fic ever. *Faints***

**Love you all!**

**xx Nina**


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight: Cato

_And I've been a fool and I've been blind  
I can never leave the past behind  
I can see no way, I can see no way  
I'm always dragging that horse around_

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound  
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground  
So I like to keep my issues drawn  
But it's always darkest before the dawn_

-**Shake it Out,** by Florence + the Machine

~Cato~

I gaped for a solid ten seconds before Lyme coughed. But I couldn't help myself. How was I supposed to?

"Look at you," I called out, my voice raspy. "What's the occasion?"

She shifted. "Well, there's this thing called New Year's. You've probably heard of it before."

"Never in my life." I walked forward, feeling like I was moving in a phantom's body. Billowing curls, thick lashes, and a black dress that hugged every muscle in her. I could only imagine how many hundreds of miles went into those.

Something about it made my stomach drop very quickly.

"Shouldn't you be celebrating with Quaid right now?" I asked.

"Absolutely."

"Then why aren't you?"

She kept chewing at her lip, and it took her a minute before sayings, "Because I'm here to see you."

"Why?"

"Because I can't stop thinking about you." I could hear a note of frustration in her voice.

"Since when?"

"When the fuck d'you think?" she said, irritated. "Since your heartfelt confession at Quaid's party last week, genius."

I snorted. "Well, it took you long enough."

It was a harmless comment, but the look she gave me said otherwise. "Fuck you, Cato." I hardly had time to register it before she turned on her heel and started walking away.

_Wait a minute._

She was a pissy girl, but comments like that didn't get her worked up. No, something else had to be eating at her. And if there was one thing Clove couldn't stand to talk about—

Oh, shit.

I just blew it.

I ran forward, and grabbed her arm.

"Hey, wait, I'm sorry—"

"Cato."

"Really, that was stupid, I'm an ass."

She whipped around to face me. "Do me a favor and let go of my wrist."

I shook my head. "I'm not letting you walk out on me."

"Then stop." She said. "You want me stick around? Stop interrogating me and let me say what I have to say, because if I think too much about it then it's never going to come out!"

I furrowed a brow. "Too much about what?"

She hit my hand, and I dropped her arm, hanging on to the look in her brown eyes. "The fact that I can't get you off my mind. The fact that you're _in love with me,_ which I still don't understand—"

I laughed, and this time I didn't care if it sounded mean. "Really, Clove? That's what you're here to talk about, why I'm in love with you? Well stop looking for answers, because you're not going to find them."

"Ludwig—"

"I'm in _love _with you, Clove. There's no fucking way to explain it." My heart raced, but I kept talking. "And this might be a little hard for your overachieving brain to process, but sometimes you're not going to understand everything that's thrown at you, and you're just going to have to go with it."

She blinked, for a second, and held back whatever she'd had ready to come out of her mouth. Time suspended around us.

"What's it like?" she asked.

"Huh?"

"Being in love. What's it like?" She looked at me searchingly, and I didn't even have a chance to open my mouth. "You know, is it when you can't stop thinking about someone?" She threw up her hands, her face dead serious. "When you're around them and you wonder why they can get under your skin so much, but when they leave you wonder why you miss them?" She stepped forward, her voice wavering. "When you're dead terrified that one day, you'll fuck up and it'll all be over?"

I gulped back whatever was in my throat.

Clove's voice. The look in her eyes. The way her nose was inches away from mine.

None of this was hypothetical.

"You're scared?" I asked.

She nodded.

"You don't need to be scared when it comes to me," I said to her.

I wrapped my hands around her waist.

"You're sure?" she asked. She was trying to keep her voice above a whisper, but it wasn't really working.

"I'm sure."

"So if I told you I was in love with you . . . ?"

Her words hanging in the air was more than enough for me.

I'd kissed her before, and under two completely different circumstances. One time out of drunken lust, the other frustration. And then she fell out of my life for a year, and I had blonde hair, big boobs, and grade A popularity to kiss all I wanted.

I knew I'd missed her. I just never knew how much.

Lyme was hollering in the background, but it was all noise as I kissed Clove, feeling her completely become a part of me. There was nothing holding her back, nothing stopping her as she fell into me. _I hate you, I love you. _We'd been playing that game for two years. Two years of dealing with a girl that wouldn't let herself believe she was capable of feelings. Two years of dealing myself and thinking that popularity was enough, parties were enough, and random hookups were enough.

They'd never be enough again.

I pulled away, because I needed some air. I looked her in the eye.

"What made you change your mind?" I asked, running my thumb across her jaw line.

She shook her head. "I didn't. I just stopped lying to myself."

This time, it was her that crushed her lips against mine. And this time, we didn't stop, not even to watch the ball drop.

XXX

**A/N: . . . *squees* CLATOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!1!11!**

**Writing this was so incredibly satisfying, I can't even. **

**I love Clato. I love FF. I love life. I love **_**all of you fucking amazing people, for making this fic my most popular one of all time. **_**Thank you, thank you, thank you. **

**The show's not over, we've got two more chapters left. One with Glim and Marvel, and one with all four of them. And after that it's adios to prolly my favorite thing I've ever written.**

**Thank you all so, so much for following me on Cato and Clove's journey.**

**xx Nina**

**PS. If you want to check out Kiss Me, my newest plot bunny, I'd appreciate that a shit-ton.**


	29. Author's Note: I liiiiiiiiiiiiive!

I hate to be _that _asshole, the one that goes MIA and pops back in after a month only to have the update be a fucking author's note. But "desperate" times call for desperate measures, and I'm sosososososo incredibly sorry for this but I feel like I owe you guys an explanation. My Spring Track season just picked up (whoopee!) which basically means forty miles a week/three hours a day practicing, and alongside that I've just gotten my first job (coaching small children, go figure) which I'm juggling alongside the usual school-craziness (3rd quarter junior whuddup). Totally lame excuses, I know, but this is the busiest I've ever been in my life and fanfiction has had to take a backseat.

That being said, I'm really really really really really sorry that I haven't been updating, BUT I wholeheartedly plan on finishing Shake it Out and continuing Kiss Me! No idea as to when that'll be, but at the very latest I'd say the end of this month, since I'm going on break before then and I'll definitely have some wiggle room. Again, I'm super sorry, just know that I haven't forgotten you guys and that I'll keep writing no matter what.

Aaaaaaanywho, here are some totally awesome fics you guys can read in the meantime:

Vertigo by quiet-little-wallflower (best SYOT ever, period.)

Pretty Dresses by Ellenka (I'd hazard to say my favorite fic of all time, Gadge.)

The Blood of the Beast by Paper Space (Clato at its finest.)

I suck, majorly. Just know that I'm really sorry and I completely plan on finishing what I started. Love you all xx

Nina


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